Tag: Lesbians

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Healthcare Others

I’ve been watching this assault on women and lesbians developing for years

This matters to me because I’m a lesbian and as a lesbian I increasingly feel that I’m being erased. Back in 2003-06 I was actively involved in Stonewall in my region. I was on the regional committee, which was headed by a lesbian. Also on the committee was a self-declared non-binary man who was studying Gender Studies at a local university and a transwoman. Although nothing had been said publicly Stonewall had already brought Transgenderism under its now-infamous umbrella. When I questioned this and pointed out that transactivism and lesbians were not a good fit, and when I asked what a straight self-declared non-binary man was doing at Stonewall meetings, it became clear that I was no longer welcome on the committee. I and another lesbian who also spoke up were treated with disapproval.

Our words were secretly recorded by the non-binary Gender Studies student and later included in a pro-trans lecture he gave in which we were quoted and cited as ‘the problem’.

I’ve been trying to warn lesbians for years that Stonewall and Pride don’t represent lesbians and until recently no one’s wanted to believe me.

I’ve been watching this assault on women and lesbians developing for years and very few people have believed me until recently.

I’ve been actively resisting by speaking about it within women’s and lesbian circles. I’ve been blocked and defriended by lots of people. People used to roll their eyes but with the help of material from Woman’s Place UKTransgender Trend and so on I’ve been able to debunk a lot of the nonsense.

I engage with my woke local council, though the fact that I’m an older lesbian means I’m talked down and over by the woke mothers of transgender children.

I continue to hold strictly female events and groups, albeit publicised carefully and not publicly, and to correct anyone who tells me it’s not legal.

I’ve spoken up in a theatre and cafes where the only loos have been unisex and asked loudly why this is so, and what are women who don’t want to find themselves in a cubicle next to a man to do, and occasionally other women have joined in. No one likes unisex loos.

I’ve attended a couple of Woman’s Place meetings, raised issues with my local council and other councils (notably Leeds), stickered with Woman: adult human female and taken part in  some direct action. Was due to go to FILIA this year before Covid-19.

I’ve sent a load of people to Mumsnet’s Feminism Chat and they’ve spread the word in turn.

I’ve lost friends. People think I’m a transgender bore and have refused to believe that the very definition of woman is under threat.

I’ve become very aware of ageism and have been astonished at the way I’ve been put down particularly by younger feminists.

I’ve never thought of myself as particularly clever or rational but I’m really very frightened by the speed and stealth with which people have been duped into believing something that, once you.  start to ask a few basic questions, falls apart,

I’ve felt isolated at times and wondered whether it’s me that’s mad. I look at Canada and Ireland and the state of academia and despair. I think there is good reason to be very scared, particularly if you’re a lesbian. It’s shocking how complacent everyone has been in enabling Trans ideology to go untested and unquestioned.

Perhaps the most negative thing of all is realising how easily seduced by dangerous ideas people are. I never used to understand how the nazis could have attracted so many people. Now I see  how easy it is to persuade apparently clever, influential people that black is white, male is female and it’s reasonable for a judge to tell a woman to call the man in the dock opposite ‘he/ him’ on pain of imprisonment. That judge should have been disciplined.

I’ve been a Guardian reader and a Labour voter my entire life and now feel disenfranchised because I can’t vote for Labour or the Lib Dems because of their mindless adoption of TWAW politics. It’s really unsettling.

And finally, I have lost trust in those who are supposed to be brighter and more powerful and informed than me. So many MPs and councils and doctors and judges and teachers and university lecturers have just lapped this gender crap up without question. Including women and lesbians! So many people who turn out to be deeply, blindly misogynistic and homophobic. That’s the really frightening thing. That’s what gives me nightmares.

Susannah, adult human female

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Others

For the first time I was in lesbian company where we’d all felt the same but had not spoken up before

I used to attend lesbian conferences in Europe and in recent years (noticeable up to 2014 when I stopped) became more and more uncomfortable with lesbians taking testosterone and AGP’s (autogynaephilic) in lesbian space. A new breed of ‘queers’ had arrived, with coloured hair, anarchist views and aggressive stance.

In the end the first non trans lesbian conference was held in Amsterdam in 2013 I think, and for the first time I was in lesbian company where we’d all felt the same but had not spoken up before.

I joined Twitter and became aware of Maria Maclachlin’s assault. At that point I really started to take an interest as I had feared for a few years something similar might happen.

I am under my own name on Twitter and am vocal. Sometimes I get nasty comments but nothing serious. I am a little nervous but think I need to stand up.

II, Middle aged lesbian, I’ve seen and experienced a lot, but nothing like this

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Private sector

I’m no longer welcome in most LGBTQ circles/groups

This matters to me because I’m a lesbian who thinks males literally can’t be lesbians so I’m no longer welcome in most LGBTQ circles/groups. I care because sex being superseded by gender is harmful to women in too many ways to go into in this short paragraph! Women’s sport, vulnerable women’s safety, data collection and adequate provision of services, and women being able to speak the truth about their reality are all negatively affected by gender identity dogma and ‘trans women are women.’

I have not done as much as I should have done! So far it’s just been conversations with friends and acquaintances trying to raise awareness, online discussions, and writing to politicians. I’d hoped to attend a rally in March but didn’t go because of Covid19.

I have experienced very few negative consequences, comparatively. It has made some friendships very difficult, but as yet not ended them. My work is thankfully unaffected, as I work in a tiny forestry co-operative with a small number of sympathetic men. The main negative personally is my alienation from the LGBT community and organisations who will brook no dissent, and alienation from Labour/Green circles.

Helen

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Healthcare Private sector

I don’t look like many women I know

I am a woman. I don’t look like many women I know. I am 5ft tall, AAA bust, short hair, don’t wear make up, am ordinary and I can be who I want. I was born in the 70s and in the 80s I could be who I wanted to be with a shaved head in a greatcoat and army boots. I was still a young woman and had relationships with young men.

My sister is 3 years young than me and was a tomboy and known as Steve for several years. She is now a happily partnered lesbian – thank goodness.

Teenagers need to know that they can be who they want and that struggle in life is normal – not a pathology. I have 4 children and the thought of any of them being told they should have surgery to identify as something is abhorrent to me. I have adult sons who have managed risks of knife crime and drunken idiocy so far ok.

My daughters are teens and they need to know the support of women and also know that the truth matters. If they think someone is a man they should be able to say so, not be forced to lie and tolerate a man in a space where I hope they aren’t at risk from men who upskirt, spy in changing rooms and generally perv over young girls – and now being able to do so in the open as transwomen.

My life in the body of a woman has been rocked by menopause and this has made me more aware of the effect of hormones on my body than pregnancy.

I refuse to believe or accept that a man can be a woman and it pains me that girls feel they can’t be women.

I created a new Twitter account to keep this thinking separate from my business. I also have a blog where I rant. I keep talking to my children about these issues but my 17yo already considers me to be a TERF.

I remain silent on these issues in my business environment. I voted Leave too so….

Rachel , An adult human female

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Private sector

No dissent is allowed especially in corporate workplaces

I care because as a lesbian I fear that young lesbians are being pushed down the path of trans rather than being encouraged to be happy in their own bodies. I feel this ideology has been pushed through with no debate and no dissent is allowed especially in corporate workplaces.

I tried to make point on my work internal social media platform but was shot down.

Discowings, working class lesbian living in South London

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Others

I can’t ignore the blatant misogyny and homophobia

As a young woman and lesbian, I can’t ignore the blatant misogyny and homophobia that has taken over the trans movement. 

SY, France

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Healthcare Media and Arts

I stopped being an activist for social issues for a while, trying to understand where I was wrong

This matters to me because I am a lesbian, and have been harrassed by trans activists before I even know what a terf was. When I was younger(around 18yo) I was a vocal feminist and lbgt activists on tumblr, and supporting trans people, but a lot of trans messaged me saying I was transphobic because I asked trans people questions to better understand and help them. After that, I faced more and more issues with harassment based on my sex and sexual orientation, so I stopped being an activist for social issues for a while, trying to understand where I was wrong.

Last year, I came to the conclusion that I wasn’t wrong, and made another blog, going back to being a feminist and lgbt activist. Without the T this time.

I also care because when I was young, I fell in love with my female best friend, and I tried being more masculine to woo her, so I know that being a lesbian can be confusing and I want to help young lesbians to not hate and change themselves.

I created a new tumblr, a twitter account, I try to donate when I can, and to speak up when it doesn’t put me in danger. I plan to volunteer at a women’s shelter at the end of the pandemic.

I have been harrassed online (death threats, pictures of dead and abused animals, threats of men saying they would hurt children if I keep speaking my mind…) and I have lost some friends over it. It’s still something I can’t talk to some of my friends because I know they would disapprove without letting me explain my experiences.

Lavande, Lesbian working in publishing, France

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Men

Stonewall etc have tried to deny same sex attraction and replace it with gender

I’m a gay male. I feel concerned that Stonewall etc have tried to deny same sex attraction and replace it with gender. I am worried that this could result in serious undermining of gay / lesbian rights which I feel are more fragile than some appear to think.

I’m very concerned that young gay men / lesbians may take hasty and life altering decisions to transition and then regret it later. I do not trust organisations like Mermaids or Stonewall not to encourage transitions in young people who might actually just need time to come to terms with sexuality.

I have put across my views on Twitter. I have spoken to various friends and a couple of colleagues about this issue. I wish I could keep my mouth shut as it doesn’t win friends, but I just feel it’s so serious.

I do wonder if I haven’t lost one or two friends about this issue, though no one has said that directly (just disappeared). I generally try to keep quiet apart from on Twitter where I am partially anonymous (though use my real name).

I worry slightly about a convo I had at work with a senior manager who runs the Pride network.

I generally keep it fairly low key though so no huge issues.

Gay Man

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Healthcare Media and Arts

Obviously lesbians can’t have penises

It started as bafflement at the perversion of language – obviously lesbians can’t have penises – and grew into a horrified realisation that there is a huge movement to define men as women (and vice versa), which particularly concerns me because it appears to me totally regressive, and I don’t want my children to grow up thinking they can’t be gender non-conforming, and that instead they have to ‘become’ the opposite sex.

I also see a lot of men taking advantage at the expense of women by claiming membership of their sex class, in business, in sport, in shelters, in prisons, in politics – and as a man it appalls me.

They do not seem to care that men oppress and abuse women, and that it’s not even about transwomen – it’s about the bad men who will take advantage of the freedom to ‘be women’ if that right is extended to any man.

I have written things which have had an impact on the debate. I also tweet furiously (but politely) under a pseudonym.

Businesses which were implicated swiftly dissolved their relationship with mine. I believe under pressure from their internal LGBT reps.

MC, Centrist dad

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Media and Arts

This is not what I fought for, this is not what I marched for

I care about this issue because women, especially lesbians, are being erased.  I’m a lesbian feminist with a degree in Women’s Studies.  In the 90’s I ran a women only night in the Gay Village in Manchester.  I had to fight to keep it women only (one night out of 7 nights on the top floor of a club that was mainly male on the other two floors).  This is not what I fought for, this is not what I marched for.  It’s corruption and misogyny and it terrifies me.

I’ve spoken out with friends and anyone who knows me will know my position.  I also donate and try and bring the issue out into the conversation in my sad attempt to get friends and family to take notice.  But that’s it because I work in media and currently looking for a job.  I will not get hired.  It’s f*cking insane.

Friends for decades are gone.  I don’t miss them.

Donna C