Tag: single sex spaces

Categories
Healthcare Parent

Coming across a group of trans identifying men in the women’s toilets in a restaurant was a shock and I felt intimidated

I care because like all women, growing up female I suffered sexual harassment from the age of 11 until menopause. Knowing that women’s and children’s safety was being weakened and threatened in my lifetime was a call to action. It was not going to happen on my watch!

Coming across a group of trans identifying men in the women’s toilets in a restaurant was a shock and I felt intimidated. I asked them to leave, I was told to “Fuck off, we have a right to be here you ugly little trsnsphobe”. It was reported to the restaurant manager who did nothing. Imagine if a young girl or child had gone into that toilet alone!

I have joined the local radfems group and attend regular meetings. I attended the Women’s Place UK.conference in London.

I regularly post stickers around my town and have written to my MP.

I talk to friends and explain what is happening.

I tweet. I have lost an old friend who was a Labour PPC and am nervous to broach the topic with other political friends.

I have to keep quiet at work.

Hyacinth Bucket, Lifelong labour and TU activist and employee

Categories
Healthcare Parent

Single sex spaces – a negative experience

Several years ago, a friend and I walked into a public bathroom with my friends then 6 year old daughter, ‘K’.  At the wash basin was an individual dressed as a woman, but otherwise their appearance was very much male. Short hair, facial hair, tattoos on the arms etc. K asked quite loudly as children will, why is that man in the girls room? 

My friend, trying to be diplomatic, shushed her daughter and said that all ladies can use a ladies room. K said, but he’s a man, in a dress. At this point the individual, flashed us his entire male genitalia and said he identifies as a woman and if we don’t like it, suck this. 

My friend grabbed K, we fled with K’s urine running down my friends trousers as we went. Personally, I was terrified, intimidated, embarrassed and utterly shocked. My friend was understandably both furious and heartbroken that her daughter had witnessed that, and K, now approaching 13 remains frightened of men. 

I am sure there are many, many genuinely trans women that would never dream of this type of behaviour. I don’t know if this individual was just fed up of being denied as a woman or if he was in fact as I believe, a predator. Either way, as far as I am concerned, especially now I have young children of my own, whatever rights people think they should have, children’s rights should come first and foremost every single time. 

Generally I don’t believe that trans women are a problem, predators are the problem and predators come from all walks of life. That being said, when I see twitter comments such as ‘JKR can suck my trans lady d**k’, I am reminded of that awful day and the fact that ladies do not say suck my d**k to ladies. 


I don’t have the answers for the trans community on how they can feel included, but I am compelled to say that I stand with JKR and single sex spaces should be protected. 

I am yet to post anything publicly or on social media .This is the first time.

Concerned mum, Wishing to keep sex real

Categories
Healthcare law

How can we fight for rights for a group that cannot be defined?

The trans issue acts to hide the nature of women’s oppression. I am a Marxist and a materialist and I believe that women’s sexed bodies (in relation to childbearing) is the source of our oppression as women.   To deny the reality of this, is to make it seem as if there is no material basis to why we are raped, violated, beaten, subjected to FGM, bought and sold, burdened with caring, excluded, marginalized, underpaid etc etc etc.

Also, I am a lawyer. Legal rights stem from activism. Abortion rights, rape laws, marital protections, childcare, equal pay etc were won on the back of the “women’s movement”. How can we fight for rights for a group that cannot be defined. Are we really going to be able to fight for rights for “vagina holders”. Trans issues are a legal nonsense based on individual feelings, rather than collective needs based on material reality.

There are other issues. I have done immigration cases for 20 years. I do “gender based violence” claims for women and girls.  It took decades of campaigning to have “gender based violence” accepted as a “particular social group” (a refugee category). I have won cases for girls from Somalia based on the fact that 98% of girls will have their genitals mutilated and enjoyment of their sex lives permanently destroyed if they are returned there. Not a single one of those millions of mutilated bodies are “girls with penises” (I am so angry now as I am writing this).

How can people continue to use statistical evidence to highlight violence against women and girls if we are no longer able to define the bodies of women and girls.

TRA logic would say these are also “boys’ bodies” (trans boys) TRA logic would say “many girls are not mutilated” (ones with penises) Its such utter nonsense that I can’t even believe that I’m having to respond to such nonsense in order to continue to protect the lives of children.

I find it hard to articulate the amount of anger I feel at telling children their bodies are wrong!

I am getting more vocal every day!

I post regularly on social media. I comment regularly to friends.

I have been called a terf on numerous occasions.

I have been bombarded with anime threats of violence.

The most hurtful is that I have been a progressive activist and campaigner my whole life. Many of those I campaigned with now consider me to be a nasty bigot.

Barbara M, Socialist, activist lawyer

Categories
law

I am careful with content and tone even on my anonoymous twitter account

As a feminist all my life I feel we have sleep walked into a very worrying situation. As a teenager and young woman I was very active in feminism. Family and professional life then intervened and I took my eye off the ball. Things were good for me – a supportive stay at home husband who looks after the kids and good career progression and support at work – yes some stereotypes and bias but on the whole good. I naively  assumed things were getting better. But I suddenly woke up to find that women’s rights are eroding not getting better. My lived experience and the biases and prejudices I have battled all my life are not recognised.

The issues that arise from my biology – periods, pregnancy, birth, breast feeding, time off for babies – are ignored.

What makes me a woman is my biology not my feelings. I have battled sex based stereotypes all my life – and now find they define what it means to be a woman. Being a woman is not about make up and heels and clothes. My daughter could be expected to change in Top Shop next to a man or compete against a boy or use the same toilet as a man.

I am so not transphobic- I am a liberal leftie type who has always supported minorities and oppressed groups and now I am the transphobe because I believe in biology. Seriously?

I have discussed with colleagues, family and friends and have spoken out anonymously on twitter

I was initially open on Twitter but was cautious and exercised a lot of self censorship particularly after seeing Twitter pile ons and also observing some people being subject to letter campaigns to their employers. My job is safe – I am a partner in a law firm and virtually impossible to sack plus I am close to the end of my career anyway- but I am responsible for a team of people who rely on me to bring in client work and it would not be hard for a TRA to work out the names of the major corporations we act for and approach them to say that their lawyer is a transphobe. So I was cautious.

But then I was spoken to by the head of our LGBT+ group who said it had been brought to his attention that my tweets “supported the women’s perspective” and that it might have a “potential impact on transgender colleagues who are not yet open”. 

As a result I set up an anonymous Twitter account. I very occasionally like GC content from my open account but only occasionally. I am still careful with content and tone even with my GC account as it would be possible to work out that I am a lawyer and someone could still approach my regulator who would have the power to find out who I am should anyone complain. 

George , woman, mother, leftie feminist lawyer

Categories
law

I am concerned about protecting single-sex prisons and hospital wards

This matters to me because I am worried about young girls making irreversible decisions about their bodies. I am also concerned about protecting single-sex spaces such as prisons and hospital wards.

I co-signed a letter, joined a group, challenged various organisations on their policies, supported LGB Alliance and spoken up on Twitter and Facebook.

I have received vicious attacks on Twitter from anonymous accounts and been verbally attacked by another barrister.

Charlotte, Barrister

Categories
Others

A birth certificate should be a legal document of Truth not a pretence

Matters because women are and have been oppressed throughout history all over the world because they are biologically different from men. That is the only reason.

We therefore need protections because of this. To redefine the word woman to mean anybody who identifies as such completely removes any legal protections specifically for women.

I object to to the word woman being Redefined to include anyone born male. Being a woman is not something that can be identified into by anyone born male. It is offensive to me that this is even being considered. I cannot believe that we have created a situation where somebody who is biologically male can change their legal birth certificate to make it a falsehood. Nobody can change their sex. You are born the sex you are born and you remain that sex until you die. If I give birth to a male child I do not want that birth certificate to be able to be altered to pretend that I gave birth to a female child when it is not true. A birth certificate should be a legal document of Truth not a pretence.

I have contributed greatly to threads on Mumsnet feminist board. I have joined several secret Facebook groups to discussed the matter. I have campaigned with fairplayforwomen handing out leaflets in my local area and explaining to people about the government’s consultation for amendments to the gender recognition act. I am very vocal on Twitter where I have have allied myself again with fair play for women. I have been to many of the woman’s place meetings. I have been to a meeting held in Manchester about detransitioners which was very moving. I have taken part in in Greater Manchester resistors acts of resistance including reassigning unisex toilets and taking them back for females only. I have adult human female stickers and I sticker in my local area when I am out and about.

I have been abused on social media constantly. I’ve argued with people I know on social media and tend not to mention it anymore on Facebook because people don’t seem to want to discuss anything political if it goes against the current woke ideology. People do not seem capable of critical thought about this they just assume that it is lumped in with LGBT rights and so it is progressive.

Kath yer Mum Wife Sister Daughter Woman #adulthumanfemale

Categories
Education Healthcare

I fear for the impact of gender ideology on children

As a parent, grandparent and longterm volunteer in a primary school, I fear for the impact of gender ideology on children, both psychologically and medically. I have a huge concern for safeguarding across the board – in all the areas impacted by a belief in gender identity – single-sex spaces (toilets, changing rooms, prisons) and single-sex services (female HCPs for smear tests and mammograms, for body searches in prisons and airports, for intimate personal care in social-care settings).

I am also incited to speak up because of the impact of gender-identity ideology on women’s rights – the opportunities for the female sex in sports and politics and STEM and other areas which are now offered to anyone who “identifies as a woman”. 

I’ve posted on FB on the topic but not as much as I might have and other friends have. I have good friends with “trans children” who are hurt by my speaking out at all on this. I have chatted personally with members of my family, and extended family, and some friends.

At the school where I volunteer a child had a “gender non-conforming” issue: I discussed Transgender Trend + their schools pack + other resources for the family with the headteacher/Senior Leadership Team; and gave them a copy of Rachel Rooney’s book, which they appreciated. 

I wrote to my MP 3 years ago and had her full support on these issues. I wrote full responses to the English and Scottish GRA consultations, and I’ve bought postcards from Fair Play and Standing For Women and left them in women’s toilets.

A couple of close friends consider I am being unfair and unreasonable but we haven’t fallen out. I am overly cautious on being very public on speaking up as it would hugely impact my husband and his career.

Aunt Gertrude, mother, grandma and teaching assistant volunteer in primary school

Categories
Others

A non genuinely transitioned man accessing my safe space would totally close down so many things for me

I care because I know what is is to be afraid of men. I was raped when I was 20 . When married my husband was abusive to me and later to my oldest daughter . I left him and shortly after that I was attacked outside my flat when I took my dog out for a last pee . It was attempted rape. The man got 5 years for assault with intent to ravish .

Each time the effect on me is that I cannot bear to see a man naked from the waist down. I still get a terrible fright if someone approaches me from behind and I’m very cautious in lifts , car parks , the street etc.

A non genuinely transitioned man accessing my safe space would totally close down so many things for me . Sports Changing rooms  , toilets in bars and restaurants and shops – especially if the are along long corridors / down in basements etc . The whole thing is terrifying.

My eldest daughter is a lesbian and she and her wife are very concerned about this too especially the “your a bigot / terf if you don’t want a girly dick” threats.

I have posted on Twitter and FB . Spoken up at my SNP branch meeting and posted info to the branch Whatsapp . Joined- founder member of a local women’s group for Independence . Shared info with friends. I’ve had a few insults on social media, not to my face.

M, Senior adult Post menopausal woman

Categories
Healthcare Parent

They built an entirely new block of “all gender” toilets with very limited school funds

I care because I have daughters and they should not have to face this dangerous ideology.

I have spoken out in life and social media. I have asked my daughters school to ensure they keep sex segregated facilities after they built an entirely new block of “all gender” toilets with very limited school funds.

I’ve only experienced negative reactions on social media.

Cheryl , Fighting for women’s rights and safeguarding children

Categories
Public Sector

I was a Prison Officer so I had a valid contribution to make

I don’t understand the UK today, why has ‘diversity’ mandatory training in all jobs suddenly become something done by Stonewall – who as far as I can tell from Twitter, have invented a new range of people, instead of just male and female. I

am, at age 52, glad not to be working and having to be ‘educated’ to believe a male with intact genitalia is a woman, the same as me.

I am house bound, no friends and family, so other than trying to put across the dangers of putting men in a women’s prison as Labour MPs like Ms. Butler are recommending, (even when the man has intact genitals but claims to be female), by my use of Twitter, there is nothing I can do.

Just the one Twitter mention of that issue being wrong and dangerous, and I was swamped with hateful tweets and had to lock my Twitter and change the name I used. Yet I was a Prison Officer, so I had a valid contribution to make.

I also emailed the Body Shop about their patronising Tweet to JK Rowling, and have just got a long email back, none of which makes any sense but informs me that ‘males menustrate’ and that ‘ some women don’t have periods’. I don’t understand the world around me now at all and scared of interacting with people if this is what they believe.

I was swamped with hateful ‘Terf’ tweets that left me absolutely shattered – my usual arthritic  joint and muscle pains increased, I couldn’t sleep and my depression and anxiety are now severe.

I had to keep my Twitter locked and will never comment again, despite supporting Maya F and JK Rowling completely. As mentioned, the long Body Shop reply email I got back after supporting Ms. Rowling, seemed to be written by somebody who was insane. Why would companies even be involved  in trans issues when they sell cosmetics and body butters? Why has my whole being as a female, woman, wife etc been erased as though I don’t exist, and the rights of a man who says he is a woman, are suddenly more valuable? Why are Body Shop campaigning to say men have periods at all?

Mrs D J, Woman, wife, and not invisible