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Education Healthcare

I fear for the impact of gender ideology on children

As a parent, grandparent and longterm volunteer in a primary school, I fear for the impact of gender ideology on children, both psychologically and medically. I have a huge concern for safeguarding across the board – in all the areas impacted by a belief in gender identity – single-sex spaces (toilets, changing rooms, prisons) and single-sex services (female HCPs for smear tests and mammograms, for body searches in prisons and airports, for intimate personal care in social-care settings).

I am also incited to speak up because of the impact of gender-identity ideology on women’s rights – the opportunities for the female sex in sports and politics and STEM and other areas which are now offered to anyone who “identifies as a woman”. 

I’ve posted on FB on the topic but not as much as I might have and other friends have. I have good friends with “trans children” who are hurt by my speaking out at all on this. I have chatted personally with members of my family, and extended family, and some friends.

At the school where I volunteer a child had a “gender non-conforming” issue: I discussed Transgender Trend + their schools pack + other resources for the family with the headteacher/Senior Leadership Team; and gave them a copy of Rachel Rooney’s book, which they appreciated. 

I wrote to my MP 3 years ago and had her full support on these issues. I wrote full responses to the English and Scottish GRA consultations, and I’ve bought postcards from Fair Play and Standing For Women and left them in women’s toilets.

A couple of close friends consider I am being unfair and unreasonable but we haven’t fallen out. I am overly cautious on being very public on speaking up as it would hugely impact my husband and his career.

Aunt Gertrude, mother, grandma and teaching assistant volunteer in primary school

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Education

My niece started taking cross-sex hormones when she was 18

I’m a public school teacher in NH USA, and have seen the lives of my students, my neighbor and my niece destroyed because they were told they had boy’s brains in girls’ bodies. My niece started taking cross-sex hormones when she was 18. She soon found her face and body irreversibly changed, but she didn’t want to go through the surgeries. She was trapped, and died of a heroin overdose. She had been talking about suicide.

I’ve spoken at the NH Statehouse against bills that have forced us to pretend that men are women – even on the sports fields – as well as bilIs that silence therapists,  have repeatedly written and spoken to state representatives and our governor, I often write about this on Facebook, an on-line journals, and letters to the editor.

After writing about the death of my niece, I received several death threats, was doxed at work, and was investigated by my school district for bigotry. I’m leaving my place of work, but I’m concerned that I won’t find another job after their HR checks out my background. I have a progressive neighbor who stalks, threatens, and harrasses me. Facebook removed one of my posts (of course) and I am often called a bigot by my friends on social media.  My relatives on my niece’s side of the family won’t communicate with me.

Stephen, special education teacher, USA

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Education

I ended up in an abusive relationship with a very charming narcissist

This issue matters to me because women’s rights matter to me – biological women’s rights.  I went to woman’s college, I have always been quite liberal, but even with all of that I ended up in an abusive relationship with a very charming narcissist, and this fringe group of radical trans women seeking to take over what it means to be a woman just triggered me, especially when I saw what was happening to people like you, Maya, and JKR.  The other reason is that I am a teacher and these rapid-onset transitions are deeply worrying.

What have I done to raise my voice?  Not enough.   I have donated to women’s charities but I was doing that before this topic came to the fore.

I’ve had some unfriending on FB, and I think some of my colleagues regard me as a bit of a kook because I bring up the issue.

Kate C, I work as a teacher in a British international school, Middle East

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Education Healthcare

I am worried about the influence that social media, influencers and so on have on children

I work in Education, I am worried about the influence that social media, influencers and so on have on children. I object to the conversion therapy that is affecting young lesbians and gay boys. As I have a child of my own I worry that he will be taught the idea that children who do not conform to gender stereotypes are not what they were born as. I am worried about the legal ramifications if there is no legal word for a woman.

I have campaigned with Fair Play for Women and a Woman’s Place, attended meetings, spoken to friends and family and posted articles and opinion on social media. I have also written to my son’s school to challenge them on terminology and in accurate interpretations of the equality act 2010.

I have been unfriended by people on Facebook for my views and had heated arguments in person.

Donna S

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Healthcare Parent

They built an entirely new block of “all gender” toilets with very limited school funds

I care because I have daughters and they should not have to face this dangerous ideology.

I have spoken out in life and social media. I have asked my daughters school to ensure they keep sex segregated facilities after they built an entirely new block of “all gender” toilets with very limited school funds.

I’ve only experienced negative reactions on social media.

Cheryl , Fighting for women’s rights and safeguarding children

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Healthcare survivor

I expect I would have either been murdered by him or killed myself if there hadn’t been a women only safe house

This matters to me because when I lived in a women’s refuge with my children, my ex partner had already injured me repeatedly and if he knew where we were he’d have done anything to get to us, I expect I would have either been murdered by him or killed myself if there hadn’t been a women only safe house because we were completely alone with nowhere else to go.

I don’t feel safe in places I can’t get out of easily with men around.

I’ve only spoken on social media and talked to a friend when I had one but she said it’s all fake news and we fell out. We are in our 50s.

I’ve talked to my daughters and grandchildren about it, my daughters, one took a while to understand then was horrified when the reality of self id was explained, the other not so long.

One of my granddaughters came home from school aged 10-11 after a boy ‘is now a girl’ and an assembly about it, unsure if she was a girl or boy but definitely both!! Who gave her the idea? Primary school, this is in East Sussex.

I’ve been called terf and insulted online but in real life just lost the friend.

woman: adult human female, I was a tomboy in the 70s & 80s. Best in the school at maths. Was told I shouldn’t be good at maths because I was a girl.

If I was a teenager now I would probably be told I was a boy and instead of struggling through puberty and being happy to be female I would have gone through a transition that wasn’t right for me.

I have followed people on twitter and ‘liked’ their posts. This week I was brave enough to share JK Rowlings post on twitter. I am worried about the career I want to develop as a novelist though, so today I have created a second twitter account so I can be more vocal about the issues and support others who are braver than me.

Siân, Adult Human Female

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Education

Very mentally unwell girls were identifying as boys and as their Biology teacher I was told I had to go along with this

I am a graduate biologist, and a science teacher in secondary schools. because I have a bit of a love-hate relationship with schools, and science being a shortage subject, I have always been able to take other jobs which I was interested in. this included working at Chiswick Women’s Aid, after which I had my first child as a single mother and became very involved in the second wave. having taken an MSc in Health Education I met one of the founders of Terrence Higgins Trust and worked as an AIDS/HIV educator for the NHS where of course I learned a lot about sexuality.

I went back into schools where I taught Biology for GCSE and A level, and spent some while teaching various subjects in FE colleges. I volunteered at a charity for street sex workers.

I eventually ended up teaching Science in an adolescent psychiatric unit. which was where the issue finally reached me as very mentally unwell girls were identifying as boys, and as their Biology teacher I was told I had to go along with this.

Luckily I was planning to retire soon anyway but that was really the catalyst, and then the JamJar happened although I wasn’t there I was firmly hooked into this cause.

I have emailed various people, met my MP (no joy there) read a huge amount, contributed to many discussions on social media particularly in my area of expertise which of course is the objective Biological reality of sex. I wrote a submission for the Oxford case (guidance now withdrawn). I have attended many events, and contributed to all the crowdfunders for legal cases. I also attend Raquel Rosario-Sanchez ‘s feminist meetings in Bristo (or did, before lockdown). I am a member of a small group affiliated to Safe Schools Alliance who are trying to get the Bristol secondary schools to look at the materials they use for PSHE, looking at their equities policies etc, and contacting two of the most worrying schools directly to ask to meet.

Stymied by Covid at the moment. luckily I have not been in danger of losing my job as I am retired. I have been shouted at in my NEU Samba Band that I have to agree TWAW, several people I know have been distinctly cooler in their reactions to me, local Labour people have accused me of being a bigot, and “knowing nothing about Biology”……

Some of my closer friends have asked me to not go on so much as I am passionate about getting the information and implications out to the public.

Alison W, Biologist, Health Educator, Teacher, Mother Grandmother

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Healthcare Others

I am worried that medical transition will be the opposite of helpful for her

I could write pages… but to summarise: Firstly, because of the impact on children of being taught they (or others) could be “in the wrong body”, the messing with their heads this involves, the way they are indoctrinated to ignore their normal boundaries around their bodies, private spaces, etc. as soon as someone claims to “identify as” something they are not, and the way some are being funnelled towards puberty blockers and further medical transition which I don’t believe will help them long-term and which have numerous potentially serious consequences.  I also know – slightly- a vulnerable young woman who is now “transitioning”, and am concerned for her as I am convinced her desire to transition is a result of her situation, and I am worried that medical transition will be the opposite of helpful for her.

Secondly, the destruction of women’s (and girls’) rights – our rights to single-sex spaces, care and support, safety, dignity and privacy, women’s sports, and initiatives to promote equality in business, politics and elsewhere are being eroded by allowing males to move in on them.  Worse, we can’t even talk about these issues properly due to the very meaning of the words being warped so that “women” can mean anyone.

Thirdly, even data gathering to better understand the needs of women as distinct from men, and the factors that affect us differently, is at risk through people “identifying into” the opposite category. 

Criado Perez’s “Invisible Women” brilliantly highlighted the importance of sex-specific data, but instead of addressing this we are at risk of worsening it with misleading data about “female” rapists, 6ft 5 “women” athletes etc., which also impacts research and policy-making affecting women and girls.

Finally the basic UNFAIRNESS infuriates me; that after oppressing women in every way for centuries, men can now do so by claiming to BE women, and claim they are now the most oppressed minority, all while trampling on our and our daughters’ rights.

So far I have: written to my MP several times and met with her in person once, mainly about GRA reform, though I also discussed child transitioning and other points with her; completed the UK GRA consultation (and also persuaded a few others to fill it in as well) and later also completed the Scottish one (I think there was another one too but can’t remember just now?); donated to several relevant crowdfunders and campaigning organisations; talked to my children’s school about my concerns, particularly about a scheme they were participating in (though without much success I fear); attended a Woman’s Place event; discussed issues with a few close friends and family; sent other letters occasionally or sent cards to thank people who had been particularly supportive; given feedback on surveys etc which used “gender” instead of sex or otherwise erased women; and supported/followed/shared posts/occasionally commented or replied (though I don’t post much!) on Twitter, Mumsnet, newspaper and other comment sites etc.

I would like to be more vocal on social media/in real life, but as I am currently jobhunting and many/most of the likely employers in my area are Stonewall champions or otherwise like to present as very “woke”, this limits me to speaking out only anonymously or “behind the scenes” (e.g. contacting my MP), as I do need to be able to get a job and fear this would be impossible if I was more open about my views.   

I have had to be very cautious about where/how to speak up as I am currently jobhunting and worry about wrecking my chances of getting a job if I am open about my views.  Too many of the potential employers in my area are heavily rainbow-flag-waving, Stonewall-championing organisations and I believe being openly gender-critical on social media, for example, would have a huge effect on my chances of finding a job, which in turn would affect my family as we will need the income in the longer term. 

I also worry to an extent about losing friends, hostility etc if I speak out more openly to friends on social media or more widely in person, though I have talked to some close friends and family and not had any negative reactions so far.

Violet

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Others

It pisses me of that men transitioning late in life are going into schools and talking to girls about working in STEM

I care because it pisses me of that men transitioning late in life are going into schools and talking to girls about working in STEM. Completely ignoring their male privilege and the things that girls have to endure, ongoing low level objectification/harassment, assault, periods and associated pain/bleeding/flooding/mood swings/impact on concentration.

I talk to friends, carefully to see if we agree. Discussed at sporting event when J K Rowling was declared a terf and explained what it meant and the implications for self Id in sport A man asked me if I didn’t believe that twaw on social media in response the matrix producers that transitioned. I am ashamed to say I didn’t flat out say no. If there were women they wouldn’t have got the money to make that film in the 1990s.

JCB

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Healthcare Parent

I don’t want their childhood brought to an early end with distorted teachings on RSE/PSHE

I care because I’m worried about the elimination of sex based protections for women. I have two children, a 7 year old boy and 8 year old girl, and I don’t want their childhood brought to an early end with distorted teachings on RSE/PSHE, and I don’t want them growing up with gender stereotypes. Let kids be kids, and be happy in their bodies.

I mainly act on twitter: I have liked and retweeted GC tweets, and (since JK Rowling’s essay) I have been posting comments. I have discussed what I read with family, spreading the knowledge of what’s happening to people who otherwise wouldn’t know. I have posted in Facebook a couple of times to correct someone’s misinterpretation of JK Rowling’s essay. I have emailed my MP to signal my support for Liz Truss’ proposed roll back of the GRA, and I plan to write to my local council, school and MP about the RSE tuition material that was due to come in in Sept 2020.

I have not had any negative consequences to date. I post in my own name (on FB and Twitter), and am self-employed, but I have a number of local authority and charity clients. I worry that if I raise my voice too loud, there could be a pile on to my clients which might make them change auditor. I cannot afford to lose fees, but recognise I cannot afford for my daughter or I to lose our sex based rights.

Rosie D-M, Small business owner, accountant, married mother of two, Woman