Tag: mental health

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Healthcare Others

I have a trans-identifying man (transwoman) in my extended family who is aggressive towards women

. The majority of our family are convinced our relative is only ‘lashing out’ because he is ‘oppressed’. (I used to be happy to use his preferred pronouns, but since his harassment of me and violent threats made to other women, I no longer extend him that courtesy.) This has been easy for him to achieve because there is so much propaganda that he can access from lobbying groups, from newspapers, from television companies.

He is over 6 foot tall, young and healthy, and I and some others of the women in my family are scared of his aggression. Currently, I feel unable to report the harassment from him to the police, as I’ve read reports of how police treat women who report these aggressive men.

I also know that his immediate family would be likely to seek revenge whether or not the police took it seriously.

I’ve had to stop speaking publicly in my real name on social media about many issues because I fear that the harassment from him will escalate into direct violence against me and my children. Even when I ‘liked’ a post about women’s rights on Facebook, that resulted in a day or two of abusive messages.

I’m branded as ‘transphobic’ because I fear this individual who happens to call himself trans. He was aggressive towards women before he started telling people he was trans, so I consider this fear to be rational. There’s nothing ‘phobic’ about it.

But I have to keep speaking up for reality because it’s the lies and propaganda about gender, trans people and ‘terfs’ that has created the atmosphere where this young man is able to get away with his abusive behaviour.

I have been able to contribute to the governments GRA consultation and have written to my MP as I don’t fear that confidentiality would be broken.

I also don’t fear that this description of my current situation will be able to be traced back to me because there are probably thousands of us in very similar circumstances.

I have a FB account in my own name that I now barely use, but I have anonymous accounts on other social media where I can share and like reasonable views without being further harassed.

The things I did to publicly speak up were so innocuous that I was surprised that the TW in my family became so abusive towards me so quickly. I shared a newspaper article from the Morning Star written by a transwoman (but apparently, not the right sort of transwoman) and I liked a Woman’s Place UK post on Facebook that wasn’t even about the gender/trans issue, but I was still told this was ‘bigotry’ because they are ‘all terfs.’ My first response was to try to reassure him that he didn’t have to agree with the other transwoman whose article I posted, but there was room was respectful discussion. That led to abusive and threatening messages not just left to me, but also to other women in my family, who were told to break all contact with me if they didn’t want to be called ‘transphobes.’

Before this happened, before he told his family that he’s a ‘woman’, he’d already been aggressive towards women and had been told not to return to his university, so I am wary that the likelihood of his harassment of me escalating is high.

The negative consequences of this are that some of my family no longer speak to me. I don’t know how much that is because they are scared of this abusive person in our family or how much they agree with him that I’m a horrible person for thinking that Women’s Place UK are not evil and for thinking that trans people are allowed diversity of thought.

Other negative consequences are that I am nervous when at home because I don’t know if he will just turn up at my doorstep or how violent he will feel justified to be. He often posts things on social media glorifying violence against the police and fascists. (He considers me to be a fascist.) This has affected my mental health to some extent. I’m sure he’d like me to be more adversely impacted than I am, but I will survive. I have to, because I need to do what I can to protect my daughter, my niece, and other women. I might keep a tactical silence in certain places, but I will not be broken.

AnonForSafety, I might be forced into anonymity for my immediate safety, but I have to keep speaking up for the safety of half of the population

Categories
Private sector

This is simultaneously deeply offensive and dangerous

I care about this because it is absolutely fundamental. We’re living in a time when our institutions – NHS, Police, Judiciary, schools, charities – have all been cognitively and ideologically captured by ideologues who assert that any man is a woman if he so claims. This is simultaneously deeply offensive and dangerous. If any man can be a woman there can be no women: no same sex females, no female healthcare providers, no women’s prisons, hospital wards, domestic violence services or changing rooms.

I have joined a real life consciousness raising group, online/irl activist groups, spoken to friends, attended the WPUK conference, and Standing for Women events, written to my MP and my local council.

I have had difficult conversations with friends who have bought into the “wrong body” narrative and think we should be “kind”. This has put a strain on these relationships but I hope I can get them to understand the reality of this situation.

Ingrid, Gender abolutionist, women’s rights advocate, realist

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Healthcare Media and Arts

It is not the number of biological sexes that are too few, but the gender roles that are too narrow

I am a free speech fundamentalist: Only threats, direct incitements to violence and speech that directly threatens national security should be forbidden. I also think it should be a human right for children to be helped to find peace with their own bodies without having to alter them hormonally or surgically. My view is that it is not the number of biological sexes that are too few, but the gender roles that are too narrow. It should be possible to be however and whatever you want/feel yourself to be inside the biological body you inhabit.

I have participated on Facebook (but not from my own page, only on other trans lobby-critical-people’s pages), discussed it at home and written to Members of Parliament.

Those who know me, do not know that I am trans lobby-critical. None of my colleagues do, I don’t think. If they did know, they would be very worried and I would lose funding and thus be rendered with no chance to continue being an artist.

Anne, Artist, Norway

Categories
Transwidows

I am a trans widow and now have a trans identifying son

I am a trans widow and now have a trans identifying son.

I have told my story in detail and will share it as much as possible. I have spoken out to friends, associates and anyone how show an interest in engaging.

I have been cut out of my son’s life, I have been cast as a terf, a bigot, unstable, dramatic, selfish and mentally ill.

Jennifer K, Mother, feminist, survivor, force to be reckoned with, Ireland

Categories
Media and Arts

I’m a founding member of Canadian Women’s Sex-Based Rights

I care about women’s rights and protections. I care about truth-telling. I care about mental and physical health for all. I care about child safeguarding. I care about preserving my Charter rights and freedoms.

I’m a founding member of Canadian Women’s Sex-Based Rights (caWsbar), non-partisan, volunteer coalition working to preserve the sex-based rights and protections of women and girls as enshrined in the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms.

I attended Meghan Murphy’s talk in Toronto and I was appalled at the hate mob that threatened us physically and verbally with misogynist slurs. I felt unsafe and rattled. I’d never felt like that before in my own hometown, which is normally safe and peaceful. As a founding member of caWsbar, I use a pseudonym to protect myself, my family and my livelihood. I hope to be “coming out” soon as gender critical.

Esmeralda Vee (pseudonym), Media worker, documentary filmmaker, mother, Canada

Categories
Media and Arts

I begin to realise I am quite prepared to chain myself to the railings for this cause

I care about this because I am a woman & I have a daughter. I am horrified at how the rights & safety of women & girls are under threat when there is still such an issue with male violence towards women & girls.

When I see women I have admired for years, journalists, campaigners, feminists, being silenced, bullied, threatened it scares me.

I haven’t raised my voice yet, I’ve shared a few things online then immediately deleted it as I’m scared of the reaction. But I’m starting to feel ashamed of my silence. As things get more absurd I begin to realise I am quite prepared to chain myself to the railings for this cause.

I am mentally preparing myself for the fight. I am reading the science, trying to seek out people who feel the same as me. It’s extremely comforting to realise there are more of us out there then the trans lobby would have you believe. Thank god for the bravery of woman’s place UK & the Labour Women’s Declaration, they give me strength & inspire me to speak out.

Sara, Woman, Mother of girl

Categories
Healthcare Media and Arts

I see girls being told that there is something fundamentally wrong with them,

I care because I see girls being told that there is something fundamentally wrong with them, at a time when they should be being encouraged to explore themselves and come to like and love themselves. What’s worse is that they are also being put on a path to unnecessary and hugely damaging medication and surgery. I also care because I believe the truth – and freedom to talk the truth – matters. I should not have to refer to a man as “she” or vice versa, any more than I should have to refer to a white person as black.

At the moment, I have not done much; I have discussed with friends and a few colleagues at work. I have refused to fill in diversity questionnaires because they ask what gender I was assigned at birth, without giving me the option to say that I was not assigned a gender at birth. I have written to the organiser explaining why I could not fill it in and asking that the questionnaire be amended to allow me to fill it in. I have contributed funds towards people taking legal action to prevent the medicalisation of children.

I have been deliberately low key about my views so far.

Kate

Categories
Students

They could have been perfectly happy

I care because there will be a LOAD of young adults in the coming months and years who have been told such appalling falsehoods about the reality of their gender/sex that they’ve gone and had irreversible, experimental surgeries and procedures, when they could have been perfectly happy had they not been encouraged to go that route. I think many may, as a result, feel awful about themselves and likely suicidal when they finally “wake up”.

I have discussed with close friends and started liking and sharing articles/media on the Internet.

I’ve been ignored by friends because they don’t want to get into it.

A, Uni, Canada

Categories
Lesbians Students

I’m tired of being told to sleep with men and accept “girldick”

I care because I’ve watched my mentally ill friends be neutered and abused by a system that does not care for them. I care because as a lesbian, I’m tired of being told to sleep with men and accept “girldick” and being called a bigot for refusing. I care because the sex responsible for 98% of sexual assaults and violent crimes does not belong in private spaces with women and because the imperative should not be on women to figure out if they’re even allowed to be worried for their safety for fear of being harassed or silenced.

I’ve written emails to larger companies who use terms such as “uterus haver” and “people with periods”. I’ve also raised awareness in my personal life and drawn other women’s attention to how close we are to losing our sex based protections.

I’ve lost friends.

Liz, College-aged lesbian and radical feminist, USA

Categories
Students

The trans movement are causing people like me to persistently self-censor every single day

I care because free speech is incredibly important, and the trans movement are causing people like me to persistently self-censor every single day – not to shift the narrative to myself when there is real oppression out there, but surely the impact on mental health more broadly as a result of this constant self-silencing can’t be positive.

I have a graduate scheme lined up, but I am afraid I will lose both my friends and my jobs if I dare voice an opinion which doesn’t conform to the majority. I am afraid, and I am silent.

Luckily, I have a few friends who share my opinions and my voice is limited only to one friendship circle in which I feel that we all have the mutual respect and maturity to listen to one another and debate civilly.

I have been berated by my friends and labelled a ‘TERF’ simply for refusing to condemn J.K Rowling.

Oscar, A