Category: Parent

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Parent

I thankfully held off in case he just needed time to work out who he was

I care because I am concerned about the safeguarding of young girls, because I know vulnerable autistic young girls and because my own son thought he was Trans when he was confused about his feelings towards other boys, and people suggested Mermaids to me. I thankfully held off in case he just needed time to work out who he was.

I have had quiet conversations with friends with autistic daughters to warn them to be ultra aware of what they are up to online and what they are hearing at school. I have had frank conversations with my own kids. I have spoken with likeminded friends online privately and on a couple of occasions posted publicly.

S, Mum of teenager

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Education Parent

I am a teacher and I know I would lose my job if I was too vocal

I’m a woman with a daughter. The world is already difficult enough in terms of inequality.

It concerns me that my daughter will be made to feel as though she’s ‘wrong’ if she doesn’t conform to the gender stereotypes charities like Mermaids seem to use as a sign someone is trans. I was a tomboy but I’m still female. I don’t wear sexy short skirts but I’m still female.

I believe women have the right to single sex spaces. It is patently unsafe to allow men who self id as women into women’s toilets, prisons, hospital wards, refuges, changing rooms. If a third space is needed, it should not replace female space

I worry about young lesbians being told they’re wrong for not accepting male genitals in a sex partner.

I am concerned about women’s sports. It’s already subject to inequality. Allowing male bodied people to compete as women will wipe out female sport.

I am concerned that women are being ignored and erased.

I haven’t experienced any negative consequences, because I am careful with the people I voice my opinion to.

I am a teacher and I know I could lose my job if I was ‘too vocal’.

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Education Healthcare Parent

I am desperately worried that my daughters will grow up with fewer rights than I had

I am desperately worried that my daughters will grow up with fewer rights than I had; and that our rights, when lost, will be incredibly difficult to regain.

I have written to and met with my MP; met with my children’s schools; helped a friend to meet with her school; talked to friends that I think will be receptive. 

I feel very anxious about taking all of these actions as I am not naturally comfortable in these situations – but I do it because I must, and because no-one else seems to be doing it. 

Doing this survey has made me realise that although I am anxious, I haven’t experienced any truly negative reactions although some of my friends disagree to some extent with me.  I am cautious though re my employment, although I have raised tangential issues a few times when possible.  I work in further education.

I haven’t experienced any consequences, although I don’t speak up as much as I feel I should.

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Education Healthcare Parent

I was forced to speak a lie

I care because I teach and am a mother. My children had a trans pupil at school (where I worked) and without consultation the other children had their right to privacy taken away in toilets.

I was forced to speak a lie, every day, in using an incorrect pronoun, all while trying to teach pupils right from wrong. The pupil was deeply troubled but no counselling was offered, simply the ‘magic bullet’ of a new name and pronouns.

I spoke up at the time. I have met 2 MSPs, one now a cabinet minister who does not support the Scottish Government’s line , the other pretty much accused me of transphobia. I have written to my SNP MP who was rude and arrogant.

I have supported the work online of several women’s groups but I have mostly hidden who I am, afraid of losing my job for speaking truth to power.

My name was leaked from a private Facebook group so I have become ultra careful online.

Have you had any consequences? Accusations of transphobia by an MSP. Being outed as party if a feminist group. Being afraid to attend public meetings for fear for my job.

Mandy , Teacher in Scotland

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Education Healthcare Lesbians Parent

I have been reported to my college for being ‘transphobic

I am a lesbian mother of daughters. I work with children.

I knew a trans-identified female when I was younger and I saw the damage she had done to herself and the relief she felt when she detransitioned.

Denial of material reality threatens the safeguarding of women and children.

I have attended marches and demonstrations. I have contributed to government consultations and online discussions on social media. I have talked to family and friends. I have an anonymised social media presence and an associated podcast.

I have lost friends and acquaintances. I have been reported to my college for being “transphobic”. I have had my social media profile reported.

Ellie Ellis , Adult Human Female podcast,

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Education Lesbians Parent

I was banned from a Facebook lesbian group

As a same-sex attracted lesbian I feel threatened by those who were born biological males and who are now claiming to be lesbians and who are trying to shame, coerce and threaten lesbians into sexual relationships.

I joined Twitter to both read articles and to post about gender issues.

I was banned from a Facebook lesbian group (Older Lesbians UK) that I had been a member of for many years for posting about the Women’s Liberation 50th anniversary as it was deemed transphobic for not centering transwomen.   

Susie, Women, mother, lesbian, teacher

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Parent

I do not want to be told to shut up

I am a woman, who is also a Mother and I think meaningful discussion is better achieved when the other side actually listens. I do not want to be told to shut up when it comes to speaking about very real concerns that face Women’s rights today. I have recently become aware of the mass gaslighting of malicious individuals disguised in what was once a cause I supported fully.

I have only recently begun posting to twitter to try and raise awareness of the issues that face women – I have been watching the subject for a while and didn’t have the courage to speak up in defence of why being Gender Critical is not a crime nor is it hateful. I hope to add to what seems to positive momentum.

I haven’t had any consequences yet, but I have seen scores of examples, which were filled with more hate and violence than anything I’ve seen from those who are Gender Critical, so I am at least aware of what kind of things to expect should I receive any negative reply. I am worried however that doxxing may occur following the recent burst in GC and Radical Feminist accounts.

Kelly

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Men Parent

My mission is to get as many men as I can to see the truth and value behind feminism

A friend asked me this ages ago. “Why do you care so much?” I told her it was because I had grown up in an atmosphere that valued civil rights, equality between the sexes (not genders) and social justice. In the intervening years, I have had the good fortune to meet and befriend many remarkable women and understand their concerns. My mission is to get as many men as I can to see the truth and value behind feminism.

I am writing a book called “We Are So Not There Yet”. It’s slow going; I’m nowhere near there yet!

I am constantly slagged off on social media, but since I am retired and a man, I don’t give a damn and give as good as I get.

Paul Milnes, Feminist ally; proud father of a daughter; grandfather

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Parent

I am fucking exhausted

I care (deeply) because I am fucking exhausted. I’ve fought for the rights of women since I realised what those rights were at the age of 13. I am now 49 and I am still watching women being told that we do not ‘deserve’ safe spaces, equality, freedom… and still by men.

That I may have to watch this happen to my daughter too makes me feel levels of rage that cannot be described. These men may be wearing lipstick and too much nylon but they are still men and I’ve had enough.

I’ve been active on social media albeit with a pseudonym and while using a VPN because I personally know too many women who have been threatened. I also run my own business which is rooted in feminism so I routinely raise the issue there too with my customers but that is a delicate balacing act which I know could shut me down. I have to chose carefully what I say and when but I’m not stopping. I also talk about this a lot on my personal social media channels which are only accessed by friends and family. Every time I say something, wherever I say it, I have to sum up the consequences.

Have I had any consequences? God, yes.

I’ve seen plenty of threats of assault but I know that’s the last resort of a desperate ideologue so don’t take a lot of notice.

I have lost friends though, amazingly friends who until this point were committed feminists. We only diverged on feminist issues when it came to this issue and it was always my friends who decided they could not be friends with me because their support of men in skirts meant more to them than any defence of women. I have not mourned their moving on in any way but I remain staggered that they think any of this was necessary.

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Healthcare Parent

My children have no idea how much campaigning I have done

This matters to me as I cannot stay silent while women’s sex based rights are removed along with our voices. I cannot watch children & young people being indoctrinated into a harmful cult.

I have joined two women’s group fighting against self ID. Ideally repealing the GRA. I have written to my MP and others, I have met with my MP.  I have ‘collared’ another MP at unrelated event & sent him emails. I have spoken out at a mayoral candidate meeting and had email exchanges with said mayoral candidate. I have emailed a Baroness and had meaningful dialogue with her. I have stickered. A lot. I have attended WPUK meetings, (5 or 6) and a further meeting organised by ‘Posie Parker’. I talk to people all the time & they ‘get it’. I attended FILIA.

I have had to be extremely careful as my adult children have been taken in and think I’m needing to educate myself.  They have no idea how much campaigning I have done. I’ve been ‘doxxed’ once and am on the cusp of a second doxxing. I don’t work so the ‘only’ damage will be with the relationship I have with my children. It breaks my heart but it won’t stop me fighting.