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Healthcare Parent

We…should not be gaslit by those supposed to care

This matters to me for several reasons.

I spent several years in women’s refuges with my child and realising that women and children like us, full of trauma, could be forced to accept having males as residents or staff no matter how they identify is deeply worrying and upsetting.

We need this environment to be female and children only and should not be gaslit by those supposed to care. I worry about vulnerable women in prison, in hospitals, on closed wards. I worry that women’s spaces are no longer women’s spaces and that we won’t know until it’s too late. I am deeply concerned about the huge amount of young people who now say they identify as trans and the way they are being constantly affirmed.

I have written letters, attended one meeting, distributed literature, had conversations with refuge staff, I am active on social media under an assumed name, I have spoken to some people in real life, I’ve donated to as many fundraisers as I can, translated information from Scandinavia alongside other small actions

I have been threatened and abused on Social Media and have been unable to speak in my own name through fear of doxxing. I am unable to speak about this socially as it could affect my sons education as we home educate, so since leaving refuge I have chosen to only speak to those I know share my views.

Leonora Christina

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Healthcare Parent

It is conversion therapy

I care because over the course of my life, I’ve experienced a lot of harassment from strange men, who followed, intimidated, groped, flashed and grabbed me, most of it in public. I’m therefore under no illusion that there are men who behave this way and therefore women need single-sex spaces to minimise risk of it (or worse) happening to them.

Men have physical advantage over women, and that is why sports have been segregated by sex and must remain that way.

I’m also aghast at the science-denialism that is at the core of this movement and that children are taught it at school.

I have an autistic child so know how dangerous it is to teach autistic children that they could be “born in the wrong body”. We know that brains don’t mature until we are 25 yet we allow children to make such a huge decision – it is conversion therapy.

No one who is considered an authority on child psychology  has written or researched gender identity yet now it is pushed on children by adults with the view of legitimising their own agenda.

While I believe dysphoria is real, for some men it is clearly a paraphilia.

What have you done? Mainly donated and discussed it anonymously online, and with a couple of trusted friends. I’m on some kind of Terfblocker, but because I’m careful under my own name, I have so far avoided anything worse

Lizzie Strata

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Healthcare Parent

I loathe the anti-science being broadcast

This really matters to me – I am a mother, with a post-graduate degree level education in biology, and I do some work, plus volunteering, in schools. And I have friends who are major activists & champions for trans-rights, who I see actively misleading us all, and actually being disingenuous to some perfectly lovely local trans-folk.

I am genuinely fearful of being shouted down, labelled a ‘bigot’ or ‘transphobic’, being removed from friendship groups, being excluded & misrepresented.

I fear that in I speaking up, my views will jeopardise my work, and trash my other community activities.

As someone who lives life as ‘evidence-based’, I loathe the anti-science being broadcast.

I dislike the cherry-picking of poor quality data. I hate the deliberate confusion of sex and gender everywhere. 

I am deeply concerned at nonsensical concepts being integrated into my children’s life, school & social groups (e.g. Woodcraft Folk).

I have re-tweeted lots of informative articles to friends, and personally discussed lots of issues with a larger group, on- and off-line. I have challenged & discussed the sex-gender & ‘born in the wrong body’ concept with medical professionals (who seem to agree with me!). I am planning to write a personal, in-depth and explanatory letter to several friends to explain ‘the other side of the story’. Some friends are politically active, but just state ‘transwomen are women, no debate’ without seemingly understanding that they are hurting their own lefty, feminist supporters.

I have felt silenced. I have had to tolerate misogynistic nonsense on my social media and can’t remove or challenge it (yet). In real life I’ve had upsetting arguments and felt belittled or misrepresented. I await more serious consequences as my anger grows, compelling the need to speak.

Scared woman., Gender-rejecting, not-cis, large-gametes

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Parent

It feels dehumanising and mysogynistic

I care about these issues as a woman, and mother of a daughter. Female only spaces, protections and boundaries should be preserved – and it should be based on biological sex rather than gender identity.

I believe my daughter and I have the right to change in an area accessible to natal females only, use female only toilets, and be on a female only hospital ward.

She should not have to give up her space on a girls sports team, girls school or any other space reserved for females, to a male. And this goes for all women and girls.

I have discussed anonymously on social media, and with (trusted) friends and family in real life. I do fear speaking out in my own name, as I have witnessed the unbelievable abuse that numerous other women have been subjected to after speaking out.

Some abuse on social media – which even when posting anonymously is distressing. I’ve been called a “TERF,” a nazi, a cunt, amongst other things… I’ve been told I want trans people “to die” – just by speaking up and saying biological women matter.

I was sent private messages: “Liar Liar, cunts on fire” – It feels dehumanising and misogynistic.

Sabrina, Woman, daughter, mother

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Parent

Sex fucking matters

I am concerned ecause I find it frightening (appalling actually) to think that self-ID could allow men into women’s spaces. To allow men to take opportunities and positions set aside for women. We need to be able to organise ourselves and be recognised and protected as a distinct category, separate from men. It’s not possible to change sex, and sex fucking matters. I have a young daughter who I want to protect from having to share her most intimate spaces with men. She shouldn’t have to compromise on her identity or safety to accommodate the feelings of men.

I attended a few talks. Opened a Twitter account to follow more GC women and learn so as to be informed when having discussions about this in real life to people I know.

I haven’t had any major consequences because I hold back a LOT worried of it affecting my friendships.

Lil , F*cking fed up

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Healthcare Parent

The boundaries which define my existence…are being erased in law

As a woman, a feminist and now as a mother this matters to me because the boundaries which define my existence as a female person are being erased in law.

Legally, politically and socially the definition of woman is being diluted to the point of nothingness for the benefit of males.

The sex-based protections offered to women through the 2010 Equalities Act become entirely meaningless and thus leave women and children at even greater risk from male violence.

Our rights, our safety, our privacy and even the language we use to speak of our lives, bodies, our uniquely female experiences and how we are oppressed globally under patriarchy is threatened by this unnecessary and highly misogynistic redefinition.

I have attended some feminist talks and meetings about this issue.I have donated money to feminist groups when possible. I try to have civil and straightforward conversations about these issues with the people in my life. I read widely and research as much as I can. I share and discuss content online in feminist groups and through an anonymous account.

I have gotten into emotionally charged debates with some people. My anonymous social media account has been featured in several “terf block and stay safe” lists circulated online. I have received some nasty, misogynistic comments.

Lisa W., Radfem mother

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Healthcare Parent

Schools need to work with parents, not push them out of the picture

This is very personal for me. My 14 year old daughter (likely ASD, complex mental health history) told her Year Head that she wanted to transition to a boy. The Year Head embraces this with enthusiasm and formally transitioned her across the school behind our backs. When we found out and told him we wanted to do watchful waiting (non affirmative, giving her a neutral space to grow and develop) he told us we had no say as parents. I had no idea affirmation was pushed by lobby groups to school as the only acceptable approach.

It’s a highly complex, sensitive issue and schools need to work with parents, not push them out of the picture.

I have written to multiple MPs and MSPs as well as the Children’s Commissioner Scotland. I am active on social media and in a parent support group pushing for evidence based medicine around gender dysphoria in children and adolescents. I have attended and spoken from the floor at various meetings – e.g. seminar at the Scottish Parliament on GD in children/adolescents.

I do the vast majority anonymously to protect my daughter’s privacy. I get backlash on social media- just the usual calling me an abusive parent (and one told me my experience was “not worthy of respect in a democratic society” – wonder where they got that from Maya, eh?). IRL has been fine as have only told a small supportive group of friends. School has been a battle with some teachers supportive, others not.


Betty

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Healthcare Parent

I have lost friends

I care about the ability to name reality, women’s safety, dignity & privacy, the safeguarding of children. I don’t think the trans movement will encourage genuine acceptance of trans people or lower their suicide rate. I think we should be open and accepting of AGP. I care that children are being told their bodies are wrong and need to be changed.

I have written to my child’s school & talked to people in person.

I have lost friends

Lucy, Mum & concerned member of society

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Parent

There are no boy ‘things’ or girls ‘things’, just ‘things’

I have been interested in the changing terminology of ‘woman’ and being exposed to gender ideology. My children are in primary school and I am happy for them to be taught about sexuality and different types of relationships. I have been concerned by the influence of Mermaids on school policy and education. There are two sexes. Gender is a social contruct and should be pushed in to the open, where there are no boy ‘things’ or girls ‘things’, just ‘things’.

I have done very little, becauase I follow on social media and have seen the consequences for those who speak out.

I tend not to speak about this with my family or friends, as I never know what the response might be, it is usually that my opinion is a bigoted one, or ill informed. That I dont understand what it is like to be Trans.

Louise, Woman and parent

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Healthcare Parent

As a parent I want my children to grow up in safety

Its basic human rights to feel safe. As a parent I want my children to grow up in safety.

I haven’t done as much as I should. With my children in school I’ve been afraid of the fall out affecting them. My child’s father is in university, which isn’t the best place to be if your partner is a “terf”. He’s concerned I’ll ruin his future.

But I helped in TransRational. A group which fought for fair rights between women & transwomen. It unfortunately failed around the same time as Posie parker went to America.

I’ve been lucky. I get a lot of online abuse. But I generally ignore what I can.

MISS PENGUIN