Tag: school

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Education Healthcare Parent

I was forced to speak a lie

I care because I teach and am a mother. My children had a trans pupil at school (where I worked) and without consultation the other children had their right to privacy taken away in toilets.

I was forced to speak a lie, every day, in using an incorrect pronoun, all while trying to teach pupils right from wrong. The pupil was deeply troubled but no counselling was offered, simply the ‘magic bullet’ of a new name and pronouns.

I spoke up at the time. I have met 2 MSPs, one now a cabinet minister who does not support the Scottish Government’s line , the other pretty much accused me of transphobia. I have written to my SNP MP who was rude and arrogant.

I have supported the work online of several women’s groups but I have mostly hidden who I am, afraid of losing my job for speaking truth to power.

My name was leaked from a private Facebook group so I have become ultra careful online.

Have you had any consequences? Accusations of transphobia by an MSP. Being outed as party if a feminist group. Being afraid to attend public meetings for fear for my job.

Mandy , Teacher in Scotland

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Education Healthcare

I am absolutely appalled at the thought of a male child undressing with female children

I care because I am appalled at the debate being shut down.

There is a child at the school I teach who presents as the opposite sex, and I do not know which way round or who they are.

I am absolutely appalled at the thought of a male child undressing with female children, and those female children not even knowing.

The idea that medically changing children’s bodies is a good thing to upload outdated gender and sex stereotypes is abhorrent.

As soon as you express any doubt, there is no allowances, you are just wrong.

I have spoken to my colleagues

I have not had any consequences yet, but I have been quiet. I’ve been blocked by some twitter accounts so I must be on some list somewhere.

E, Teacher

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Healthcare Parent

We need to stop the normalisation of this ideology

My daughter announced she was trans a few years ago. She wishes to pursue medical transition. She is 15, autistic and has many mental health issues. School, mental health services and medical services have all changed her name and pronouns against my wishes. We need to stop the normalisation of this ideology. Stop teaching kids they can be the opposite sex if they want to. Stop allowing medical experimentation on the young, autistic, mainly bi or lesbian girls of this generation.

I helped start Bayswater Support Group, a parent support network to help parents who question the affirmation only approach to kids who declare a trans identity. I have attended feminist events, I shout loud on twitter and have conversations with relevant medical and mental health personnel to try and change their approach.

I have lost one of my oldest friends as her child was one of the youngest to ever take puberty blockers in the uk. I have been blocked by friends because I refuse to accept this ideology.

Genuinely , A mum and a doctor, ready to do battle to keep the gender ideologies away from my child

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Education Healthcare Parent

I know how important language is

I care because I can see how important this is to women’s rights. I could not understand that people were making untrue statements such as trans women are women – and this was to be recognised legally. I know how important language is to if we redefine woman then women’s rights are also under threat. I started looking into the issue further and was horrified to see the promotion of gender ideological ideals being pushed in schools (the various agencies they use and the games they play such as the dice – that is not sex education – it is entirely hedonistic), children being given hormone blockers with little empirical evidence of the long term effects. I cannot believe that this is being allowed here in the UK. I am a mother, I taught for 15 years and I am shocked that children have not been protected from this – absolute madness.

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I’ve been on Twitter and I have informed friends which include teachers, nursers, and specialist children’s service workers. None of them knew about this. I don’t feel I can share anything publicly,

I reasoned if something as benign as JK.Rowling’s series of tweets was deemed hate speech (seriously this term needs explaining as there was nothing hateful in those tweets) I thought people might think I was transphobic and bigoted.

I have no issue with people want to dress or present but I do believe that sex education should not be about gender identity – rather it should be biologically based with discussion on sexual orientation (gay, lesbian, bi, heterosexual) with discussion on intimacy and love discussed too.

I have had someone calling me ‘asshole’, TERF, bigot and ignorant on social media (Twitter) when talking with others about not feeling we could share anything publicly, the thread was asking if anyone had joined anonymously just to discuss this issue – many of us had. Someone intercepted the discussion (nothing derogatory about any group of people, it was only saying things like ‘I wasn’t aware of this issue). I have not been rude or hostile to anyone in the discussions.

C, Feeling concerned about gender ideology

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Healthcare Parent

I worry so much about the climate for girls growing up

It matters as it should matter to all women, and indeed anyone who cares about women and children. It’s personal to me because I worry so much about the climate for girls growing up. I have a ten year old daughter and I have spent time trying to instil her right to boundaries, and establishments that should know better are undermining that.

I’m horrified to think we had it better when I was her age, 30 years ago, and that safeguarding is actually deteriorating based mainly on this issue.

I have been vocal on twitter but I’m basically anon there. Fb here and there but am still nervous of it. I have however been in to school, explained my objections to gender leaning sex Ed in primary schools. I’ve spoken to the other parents. I have liaised with the muslim parents at our school many of whom were not aware and are now with me in the fight to get the curriculum changed for our school. Oh and sent links and info from SSA etc, emailed the head and local MP. I’ve complained in writing to my local labour MP, although he was removed because guess what, he’s not safe around young women. I wear my Adult Human Female t shirts and have talked to a lot of trusted friends and family. It’s still not enough.

I have been messaged on Twitter a few times, was verbally abused on Facebook quite publically when I raised concerns about Time Out making such a positive spin on drag queen shows for kids, but nothing personally too threatening, no. Mainly because of not going public on twitter with my real details.

Kerri

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Healthcare Parent

My daughter has called me a terf

I care because I have four children. They are aged 18, 16, 13 and 9. The older two are fully into the gender identity cult. My daughter (16) has called me a terf and told me that my version of feminism is wrong, I need to include trans women in my feminism. My older son (18) has many online friends who are trans. I am scared by their acceptance that once a boy says they are a girl they are automatically ‘she’.

I have tweeted and retweeted accounts and I have spoken to other parents within family and at school.

I have been lucky enough not to attract too much attention but one tweet was retweeted by a famous account and I was swamped with people saying my daughter was right and that she should be taken away from me. I muted the replies.

Liz May, Concerned parent

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Healthcare Parent

It is conversion therapy

I care because over the course of my life, I’ve experienced a lot of harassment from strange men, who followed, intimidated, groped, flashed and grabbed me, most of it in public. I’m therefore under no illusion that there are men who behave this way and therefore women need single-sex spaces to minimise risk of it (or worse) happening to them.

Men have physical advantage over women, and that is why sports have been segregated by sex and must remain that way.

I’m also aghast at the science-denialism that is at the core of this movement and that children are taught it at school.

I have an autistic child so know how dangerous it is to teach autistic children that they could be “born in the wrong body”. We know that brains don’t mature until we are 25 yet we allow children to make such a huge decision – it is conversion therapy.

No one who is considered an authority on child psychology  has written or researched gender identity yet now it is pushed on children by adults with the view of legitimising their own agenda.

While I believe dysphoria is real, for some men it is clearly a paraphilia.

What have you done? Mainly donated and discussed it anonymously online, and with a couple of trusted friends. I’m on some kind of Terfblocker, but because I’m careful under my own name, I have so far avoided anything worse

Lizzie Strata

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Healthcare Parent

I loathe the anti-science being broadcast

This really matters to me – I am a mother, with a post-graduate degree level education in biology, and I do some work, plus volunteering, in schools. And I have friends who are major activists & champions for trans-rights, who I see actively misleading us all, and actually being disingenuous to some perfectly lovely local trans-folk.

I am genuinely fearful of being shouted down, labelled a ‘bigot’ or ‘transphobic’, being removed from friendship groups, being excluded & misrepresented.

I fear that in I speaking up, my views will jeopardise my work, and trash my other community activities.

As someone who lives life as ‘evidence-based’, I loathe the anti-science being broadcast.

I dislike the cherry-picking of poor quality data. I hate the deliberate confusion of sex and gender everywhere. 

I am deeply concerned at nonsensical concepts being integrated into my children’s life, school & social groups (e.g. Woodcraft Folk).

I have re-tweeted lots of informative articles to friends, and personally discussed lots of issues with a larger group, on- and off-line. I have challenged & discussed the sex-gender & ‘born in the wrong body’ concept with medical professionals (who seem to agree with me!). I am planning to write a personal, in-depth and explanatory letter to several friends to explain ‘the other side of the story’. Some friends are politically active, but just state ‘transwomen are women, no debate’ without seemingly understanding that they are hurting their own lefty, feminist supporters.

I have felt silenced. I have had to tolerate misogynistic nonsense on my social media and can’t remove or challenge it (yet). In real life I’ve had upsetting arguments and felt belittled or misrepresented. I await more serious consequences as my anger grows, compelling the need to speak.

Scared woman., Gender-rejecting, not-cis, large-gametes

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Parent

It feels dehumanising and mysogynistic

I care about these issues as a woman, and mother of a daughter. Female only spaces, protections and boundaries should be preserved – and it should be based on biological sex rather than gender identity.

I believe my daughter and I have the right to change in an area accessible to natal females only, use female only toilets, and be on a female only hospital ward.

She should not have to give up her space on a girls sports team, girls school or any other space reserved for females, to a male. And this goes for all women and girls.

I have discussed anonymously on social media, and with (trusted) friends and family in real life. I do fear speaking out in my own name, as I have witnessed the unbelievable abuse that numerous other women have been subjected to after speaking out.

Some abuse on social media – which even when posting anonymously is distressing. I’ve been called a “TERF,” a nazi, a cunt, amongst other things… I’ve been told I want trans people “to die” – just by speaking up and saying biological women matter.

I was sent private messages: “Liar Liar, cunts on fire” – It feels dehumanising and misogynistic.

Sabrina, Woman, daughter, mother

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Healthcare Parent

Schools need to work with parents, not push them out of the picture

This is very personal for me. My 14 year old daughter (likely ASD, complex mental health history) told her Year Head that she wanted to transition to a boy. The Year Head embraces this with enthusiasm and formally transitioned her across the school behind our backs. When we found out and told him we wanted to do watchful waiting (non affirmative, giving her a neutral space to grow and develop) he told us we had no say as parents. I had no idea affirmation was pushed by lobby groups to school as the only acceptable approach.

It’s a highly complex, sensitive issue and schools need to work with parents, not push them out of the picture.

I have written to multiple MPs and MSPs as well as the Children’s Commissioner Scotland. I am active on social media and in a parent support group pushing for evidence based medicine around gender dysphoria in children and adolescents. I have attended and spoken from the floor at various meetings – e.g. seminar at the Scottish Parliament on GD in children/adolescents.

I do the vast majority anonymously to protect my daughter’s privacy. I get backlash on social media- just the usual calling me an abusive parent (and one told me my experience was “not worthy of respect in a democratic society” – wonder where they got that from Maya, eh?). IRL has been fine as have only told a small supportive group of friends. School has been a battle with some teachers supportive, others not.


Betty