Tag: work

Categories
Transwidows

He left some very large women’s clothes in a cupboard where I was bound to find them

I am a transwidow. For 14 years I was married to a man who did everything to destroy my love and in the last 4 years taunted me mercilessly. He wanted me to hit him so that he could go to the police and prosecute me for domestic violence. I did not. Finally he left some very large women’s clothes in a cupboard where I was bound to find them and when I asked he said: “It’s true. I’m a transsexual”. Four months later he left us.

Slowly I found gender-critical feminist women on line and I started to learn about the psychiatric and legal framework for gender dysphoria. I had no idea that my life could be so “disposable” to him. Actually I was a victim of premeditated fraud: he tried to take my house and my savings from me, but I resisted such blatant attempts. I should have kicked him out much earlier. He is a criminal – a psychiatrist who knew him well described him as “something of a psychopath”.

More morally energetic men, such as Walt Heyer and Richard Hoskins, have found a way out of the rabbit hole. GD sufferers do know that their beliefs are untenable. That is why they are so, so touchy about anyone who questions these beliefs. But we must not condone insanity.

I have contributed to the Transwidows Escape Committee threads (all 3) on Mumsnet. For 10 years I have written comments under news and other articles on line. I have made contact with the main feminist campaigning groups and met their founders at various meetings all over the southern half of the UK. I know about 5 or 6 transwidows. In 2019 I finally set up transwidows.com (not to be confused with TinselAngel’s Transwidowsvoices.org). I have concentrated on logic or legal or professional psychiatric issues in my comments.

I am campaigning for repeal of the GRA and associated bits of the Equality Act 2010 because these laws condone insanity. I want to attack the laziness and cowardice of the GD psychiatric specialists. They have betrayed their Hippocratic oath to “do no harm”.

I have been banned from commenting under Daily Mail articles – my first tilt at the GD “windmill”. But, as I said above, I have confined my comments to verifiable statements or facts with references.

UW, Transwidow, Scientistranswidow

Categories
Voluntary sector

It has been stressful and frustrating for myself and other staff

I care because in my organisation, I have found that the constant blurring of sex, gender and gender identity in organisational policies, blogs, guidelines and training materials at best undermines their effectiveness, and at worst installs regressive and harmful stereotypes.

I care because I value the power of data to advance the rights of all, and am deeply concerned about the quality of my organisations’ evidence when we use confusing terms like ‘non-man’ or ‘woman-identifed’ in staff or community surveys.

I care because women in the UK are losing their jobs or on ‘performance improvement plans’ for speaking up.

I care because I think there is real work that must take place to fight genuine anti-rights actors and human rights abuses around the world, and until we tackle head-on the issues of conflicting rights we cannot move forward.

I have rewritten guidelines, tools, research papers and strategic documents that: used gender identity instead of sex; included incorrect or problematic definitions of gender; did not use the word women in the name of inclusion and intersectionality. 

I have carefully spoken to staff across the organisation about this issue – always from a rights-based perspective – asking questions, sharing blogs or studies when relevant. I have repeatedly attempted to influence senior managers to follow correct Equality Act legislation rather than Stonewall guidance (with partial success). I have flagged reputational risks of alienating female supporters.

I have listened to women who have been told their feminism is ‘trash’ (by men) and spent time explaining to staff why calling other staff members ‘TERF’ is unacceptable, whilst trying my best to build bridges across staff communities. I have lobbied for spaces to discuss these issues in the workplace.

The negative consequences have been opaque and veiled warnings: be careful, get in line, be inclusive.

There have been impacts on workloads – without a serious policy framework language must be agreed on an exhausting and time consuming case-by-case basis. Hours have been spent drafting detailed policy recommendations that carefully address conflicts of rights which are swiftly ignored or rebutted with the mantra ‘we will be inclusive’ with no time spent engaging in any of the substance.

On an emotional level, it has been stressful and frustrating for myself and other staff. I know a number of staff who feel silenced, and unable to discuss openly on our online work platform because of the backlash, which has included warnings by senior managers. Meanwhile, potentially negative impacts of policy capture and new strategic direction on the communities we work with are yet unknown and unexplored.

Anonymous, Working on Women’s Rights for a UK INGO

Categories
Healthcare Men

As a gay man, I thought I was part of a movement which was dismantling gender stereotypes

This matters to me because I’m a gay man who supports feminism. I see sexism as the fundamental structural inequality. It means that women are unsafe in their homes, workplaces and the street and disadvantaged in every part of their lives. It also means that lesbian, gay and bisexual people and all gender non-conforming people (assertive women and feminine men) are under attack.

As a gay man, I thought I was part of a movement which was dismantling gender stereotypes. Now I feel the LGBT movement is reinforcing sexist stereotypes and dismantling the protections and special provisions that are meant to try to rebalance a sexist society. Self ID and encouragement of children to be trans is the opposite of progress.

I want full legal and social protection for trans people who definitely face discrimination but not at the expense of women’s spaces, sports and sexual equality provisions.

I try to discuss through Facebook but am worried about LGBT activists.

S

Categories
Voluntary sector

I was born with a condition which meant my reproductive organs were not formed properly

This matters to me for two reasons; One, it’s a fundamental threat to women’s rights. and more personally, I was born with a condition which meant my reproductive organs were not formed properly. This was and has been given many names over the years but it remains and issue which is dealt with in the shadows of healthcare and support. Most people just don’t know anything about it. And that’s the way most of us have lived our lives.

It’s newest name is Intersex, which is an umbrella term and doesn’t really accurately reflect any womans experiece and has also had the misfortune of sounding like we are some hybrid between two sexes. Needless to say this misnomer has been a gift to the ‘gender’ movement.

Now I have to read about how our complex health and in some cases mental health issues somehow ‘prove’ that biological sex doesn’t exist. And if I speak up I’m a ”TERF’

I work for a charity and whilst it hasn’t really been a major focus. We have had one diversity training session which spent a lot of time on trans issues but at that time I wasn’t really focused on it. Now I dread a Stonewall type session- I really don’t think I could stomach it without possibly getting in trouble.

The only saving grace of this pandemic is that the focus will be on financial survival and other health strategies for my employer for the near future.

I’m a coward and don’t speak up. That said I used to be able to talk online in a private forum about my condition, but there’s nowhere safe to do that now.

Rena, in the shadows

Categories
Voluntary sector

As an ex prisoner I was horrified at the policies allowing men into women’s prisons

I came to the transgender debate via 3 main channels. Firstly as an ex prisoner I was horrified at the policies allowing men into women’s prisons and could not imagine the thought of women I’d known and cared about having to share cell and living space with men, particularly knowing how traumatised by men many of those women had been. That was my introduction.

Secondly as a lesbian I was alarmed to see the increasing numbers of young lesbians being referred to gender clinics, and realising that their self hatred and discomfort was being used to legitimise what I came to see as a men’s sexual rights movement.

Thirdly, I have a daughter, and while I’ve always called myself a feminist, the call to activism came as a measure to try and make the world better for her and my friend’s daughters. Silence was not an option.

I have over the past 6 years become increasingly vocal against the trans lobby. I have joined many feminist groups, helped develop and execute campaigns with ReSisters, Fair Play for Women and many others. I’ve organised and taken part in many protests, including marching at the front of Manchester Pride with Get The L Out.

I attracted nationwide controversy when I was barred from my local pub for wearing a feminist T shirt. This attracted a lot of press coverage and radio interviews in which I tried to take the opportunity to bring the issues to an audience outside feminism.

More recently I’ve been concentrating on the issues facing detransitioned women and the unique challenges they face. I will continue to work to elevate their voices and I will never stop asking hard questions about trans ideology.

The first thing to happen was that I lost 70% of my friends locally and was threatened with violence from people in my town whom I have never met nor would even recognise on the street, which was a little disconcerting.

I run charity projects providing aid to refugee women and my main donation base is women, specifically mothers, who may pull funding if they know I’m a vocal activist, so keeping these projects separate is always a tightrope act.

The main harrassment I receive is online, which is easily brushed off, but being painted as a bigot in my home town has been difficult. Especially when it’s coming from people who’ve known me for years and know that I’m the opposite. I think possibly the most negative consequence has been really, properly seeing the misogyny that pervades every aspect of life and once you see it there’s really no going back. On the bright side though, the women I’ve met through feminism have been the best friends I’ve ever had and I have no doubt that together we can pull the plug on all this madness.

Rebekah W, Gobby lesbian single mum with pockets full of terrifying feminist propaganda

Categories
Voluntary sector

I want people to live their true lives and be happy but not at the expense of women and girls

This matters to me because we can’t deny science and change fundamental realities about men and women to suit a tiny but vocal minority. I want people to live their true lives and be happy but not at the expense of women and girls.

I also really loathe the idea that repeating a mantra TWAW means it’s true. It’s just rubbish. Also every female I know ( including my 12 year old daughter in school uniform) has been hassled and received unwanted attention from men. It’s just madness and gaslighting to think that some men won’t try to take advantage of self id to access women’s spaces for abusive purposes. Why can’t men make space? I’m sick of the unfairness of it.

I responded to the GRA consultation. I’ve signed petitions and made some donations to e.g. Vancouver women’s shelter. I’ve discussed vigorously with friends and family. I also removed some signs saying gender neutral toilet that someone stuck over the women’s sign at my work. At a Secret Cinema event when the usher was asking pregnant people to come this way, I shouted “You mean women” loudly enough to attract attention. But fundamentally I feel I’m cowardly. My views  would go down very badly at my work and I do need the job. I do really admire those brave enough to speak out and I’m sorry I’m not more openly supportive.

A lot of people I know share my views and I’m not massively open about them to people I don’t know. Unfortunately my daughter’s think I’m a terf but I’m working on them…

Mamie, Sunlight not gaslight

Categories
Healthcare Voluntary sector

I have been in hospital where I have felt very vulnerable

I work in children’s services in a disability organisation. I am extremely concerned with the disregard and flouting of basic safeguarding principles in gender ideology. I also have a disability & a health condition and I have been in hospital where I have felt very vulnerable. I do not wish to be on a mixed sex ward or to have intimate tests/procedures carried out male who identifies as a female.

I have answered consultations, signed petitions and contributed to fundraisers for legal cases. I have spoken to family and friends about it. Most agree with me. Some do not.

I have been told I am being unkind by some friends for speaking up and had my social media account reported and suspended for talking about biological reality.

Rosalyn , Woman of the world, @RosalynRoses

Categories
Voluntary sector

I should be able to go swimming by myself safely and with dignity

I care about this issue because I am a woman. I am 5’2″, and don’t have local friends. I do a lot of stuff by myself as my close friends are out of county. I don’t want to be excluded from public spaces on the basis that I’d be uncomfortable sharing intimate spaces with biologically intact males. I should be able to go swimming by myself safely and with dignity.

I have used gender neutral spaces in the past, but when I was ready to leave, I found myself anxious about my safety because I could hear a group of male voices that I knew I’d have to walk through. As a short woman, I am aware of my vulnerability. I have only been subjected to minor abuses by males in my life, and I can’t imagine how much more afraid I would be if I was a survivor of rape or physical violence.

I have posted my thoughts on my Twitter page. I also try to support people who are able to make more of a stand by contributing to Crowdfunding projects.

I have lost followers, some were online friends I’d known for nearly 10 years. Some I found bitching about how my opinion represented a character flaw or represented bigotry. While a minor problem, it was hurtful.

I only feel comfortable expressing my opinion on Twitter, which doesn’t have identifiable details on it, and in order to do this I deleted my LinkedIn account so that people couldn’t picture search for me. I need a DBS to work and am anxious to avoid vexatious complaints. It’s worth pointing out that I am generally supportive of trans people and wish them to have good legal protections against harassment and discrimination. I just want to maintain single sex spaces as well.

L, Charity worker

Categories
Healthcare Voluntary sector

It offends me as a rational human being who knows humans cannot change sex

As a socialist and feminist it outrages me that women’s oppression is being redefined and repackaged as a privileged gender identity to which men belong. Our material existence as a sex class is being totally erased with real life consequences. We cannot argue for our share of resources when we’re not recognised. We cannot have women only spaces, activities and services.

We are being told that to have boundaries is exclusionary and women now have penises. It offends me as a rational human being who knows humans cannot change sex. The ideology at the root of it is dangerous and seeks to undermine our very humanity, to commoditise women and children in a neoliberal market.

Sex stereotypes are embedded once again and any girl not sufficiently passive, submissive or heterosexual to is now instructed that she is male and must take all medical and surgical options available through make her look more male like.

As a movement genderism aims to keep men in power while claiming their victim hood.

I have organised a public meeting with another woman, I have attended many meetings and joined a group. We responded to the initial GRA consultation and met senior civil servants to discuss. I have emailed my elected representatives and met them when it was on offer. I have spoken to friends and some colleagues about the issue. I have leafletted about GRA Reform. I tweet on the issue (too much!). Attended meetings at Scottish Parliament organised by Joan McAlpine MSP. Helped organise demo outside Scottish Parliament.

I’ve been lucky. I live a really quiet life, I’m not well known, I have a very common name so being “out” on Twitter is easy. I don’t have a large number of friends, the ones I have share my views. I keep political life separate from work.

Julie Smith, the struggle continues

Categories
Healthcare Others

Scotgov have effectively erased adult human females from legislation

This matters to me because pseudo-science, with zero-material evidence to support it, is used promote the lie that children can have a brain that ‘thought processes’ like that of the opposite sex. This is used to commit sterilisation and irreparable FGM on teenage girls and MGM on teen boys….crimes in my opinion endorsed by Government, committed by the NHS. Lifelong damage, just as child sexual abuse causes lifelong damage.

Women and girls safe/r spaces are being destroyed, placing them at greater risk of sexual crimes. Girls being forced to share changing rooms with naked men, as these men can watch girls getting undressed….all came about because Scotgov funded numerous trans-lobby groups who misdirected schools, womens orgs,  NHS, prisons re womens rights to single-sex spaces. Women imprisoned with violent men, incl rapists.

The rights to equal and fair treatment fought for by women…are being taken by men…handed to them by Government. Women’s scholarships, grants, sports opened up to men….effectively re-imposing the disadvantage in society that women fought against. Scotgov have effectively erased adult human females from legislation because any man can ‘identify’ into being a woman. We don’t exist in Law!

The Police, NHS, local Govt, central Govt, Education depts have all been complicit in imposing and enforcing trans-ideology across society.

I have leafleted on the streets and through doors, worked on stalls to inform the public, and talk to everyone I can, every chance I can. left leaflets on buses, chatted at bus stops, in supermarket queues. I have challenged politicians…only to find they are not interested…in fact, they have gaslighted me, used sneering, mocking tones, lyingly misrepresented most of what has been said to them (social media).

Consequences to speaking out have seen me threatened with rape, with being shot, battered. Told I am a bigot, to STFU, and have men tell me, a lesbian, that they are lesbians, been exposed to d*ck pictures. My mental health has been very seriously impacted, to the point of extreme rage, overwhelming hopelessness, violent and suicidal thoughts. There will be no forgiveness for this travesty against women and children.

Les, No forgiveness!