Tag: Abuse

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Healthcare Private sector

As a scientist I am offended by the lie of ladybrain

As a scientist I am offended by the lie of ladybrain.  Ignoring safeguards for women and children is madness.  The education system is being changed to lie to children.  Affirmation-only ignores the issues of autism, sexual abuse, that most children would naturally desist and many would be happy gay and lesbian young people.

I have responded to the GRA consultation, I have written to my MP, and I try to support women who speak publicly.  I donate to crowd funds for legal fees.

One woman at work won’t talk to me anymore, but primarily I have to remain anonymous because I want to protect my family from the horrific threats and abuse.

Mama Bear, Concerned for autistic children

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Others

I will march if I have to

I care because between the age of 9 to around 11 years old I was sexually abused by a male ‘family friend’. It matters to me to have a safe place away from men to get undressed at the swimming pool and to go to the toilet in peace without men in this space. I didn’t know or even have on my radar any issues with the trans movement and have no ill will to trans people and completely agree they should have safe spaces, unisex spaces but can never agree to give up safe spaces for women and I will march if I have to.

Well only tonight have I had the courage to post on my Facebook JK Rowling post, I’m ashamed to say I’ve not done it sooner through fear of being called transphobic or a bigot but I’ve decided I must speak out.

Only time will tell but so far 3 of my Facebook friends have liked it and no one has unfriended me, if they do they do but I hope this means real life people actually are nothing like the hate on Twitter.

Karen T, private sector (employed)

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survivor

My mother & sister were sexually assaulted

I care because my mother & sister were sexually assaulted. I have sympathy with those with dysphoria who’ve had sex reassignment but I do not trust men. They will abuse self-ID. The numbers of women who’ve been sexually assaulted by men is a warning that’s being ignored.

I have expressed myself online, despite fear of violence against me for doing so.

I believe I would be sacked from my job if my views were known.

Pear Trio, Lifelong LGBT member & supporter till all this abuse of women., Three Pears

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Others

I am angry about the drift towards rejecting the term “same-sex attraction”

I care about the conflation of sex and “gender identity” because it risks undermining the legal and political rights of women and lesbians. How can the pay gap be tracked when people who have achieved a top job as a male then identify as a woman, changing their employers statistics overnight and erasing any trace of the real picture? No longer being able to reliably record, collate and analyse statistics of the social, political and economic impact of our biological sex will make it impossible to have an evidence-based discussion about sexism and misogyny.

I am angry about the drift towards rejecting the term “same-sex attraction” and that organisations such as Stonewall are not supporting lesbians, and are actively silencing discussion on this issue.

I am very worried about the numbers of young lesbians that report that they resorted to defining themselves as non-binary, asexual or “queer”, often being coerced into having relationships with males, and taking several years to realise that they were lesbians.

I am very proud of those young women now detransitioning/desisting from a trans identity, but am very upset about their experiences of a conveyor-belt approach to hastily validating and medicalising their trans identity, with no consideration of the other factors that had led them to start on this path, and no exploration/promotion of the possibility that they were lesbians.

Given that such a high proportion of those in prison who identify as “transwomen” are convicted of serious and sexual offences, then either there is a high proportion of transwomen who are perpetrators, or a high proportion of perpetrators who falsely claim to be transwomen – either way, including biological males in women-only spaces clearly adds a new and statistically very significant risk, and the silencing around discussing this is nothing new in the context of sexual and physical abuse.

I have initiated many discussions in real-life with people and have shared articles on social media. I have taken part in discussions on social media and tried to focus my thoughts on those who are new to this discussion and need to see something other than name-calling and antagonism.

I have had a huge amount of my time taken up by having to keep responding to antagonistic and accusatory comments, rather than leave them stand – it is difficult to get the balance between not allowing people to maliciously take up my time, and ensuring that they do not get to dictate the tone and context of the discussion. I have been very fearful of reprisals and targetting of organisations that I’m publicly associated with, so have always had to double-check everything I write/say.

Jill H, Lesbian feminist

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Healthcare trans familiy

They do not know about the men demanding to shower with woman and girls in their changing rooms

In addition to the natural fairness, and women’s entitlement to their own safe spaces, my niece was inculcated into the trans cult -she is lesbian, on the autism spectrum and spent 2+ years in therapy before deciding not to go down the transmen route and has instead become a non-binary pan-sexual lesbian.  Tranns-children is child abuse, pure and simple.

I’ve just done social media stuff.  Mainly Twitter.  Tried on FB, but most people do not want to listen and still assume trans is akin to gay/lesbian and is not relevant to their lives or their children’s lives.  They do not know about the men demanding to shower with woman and girls in their changing rooms or demanding access to female only safe spaces.

I have been blocked or unfriended on social media.

Paul M, Luddite IT developer

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Others

I was terrified by the thought of periods

I had a number of moments in my childhood where I didn’t want to be female. I dreaded losing my flat chest, I was terrified by the thought of periods and if I had known I could  opt out, I would have done. I didn’t and now I am glad that this option wasn’t available when I was 10-15 years old.

I realise now that it wasn’t that I wanted to be a man, I just didn’t want to be seen as ‘less than’ or as a sexual object. I was never a girly girl  – i never liked labels, and always hated that being female meant that I wasn’t allowed to do woodwork or computer studies amongst many, many other things.

I have observed both sides of this debate very closely over the past few years and I have always fought openly against discrimination of any kind. Both sides have offensive representatives, but the more it has gone on, the more disturbing I am finding the sheer amount of people that shout TERF when someone is being inquisitive.

All my life I have fought against the old fashioned view that being a woman is about liking pink and wearing make up.

I believe that transgender women and men should have rights and support  and should never be subjected to abuse.

I also believe that transgender women should be able to use women’s toilets, but I feel very very uncomfortable with the ‘self id’ element that I see – where trans women have no intention to transition.

Most women I know have experienced some sort of sexual assault, and toilets always felt like safe places. My feeling is that toilets and female prisons are places that should never legally be allowed to be used by predators.

In terms of athletics, it is simply unacceptable that trans women are taking away women’s achievements.

I would love to discuss this more openly, but I have seen what happens when people ask questions and this whole thing is alienating me. I haven’t dared to.

I have been blocked by people on Twitter for following some gender critical people as well trans activists.

KM

Categories
Healthcare Parent trans familiy

Strangers have been given access to and coached my daughter to delete her childhood and replace her future with their transgender story

I care because my 12 year old daughter announced she is trans and is socially transitioning 11 months ago. I care because strangers have been given access to and coached my daughter to delete her childhood and replace her future with their transgender story. I care because my 12 year old daughter has been asking to go on hormone blockers before puberty because they’re safe. I care because it feels like my daughter is being taken away from me.

It was very clear to me from the beginning that raising my voice in any visible way would very quickly lead to being cast as transphobic and bigoted, someone to be excluded and worked around. I have spent months looking to understand what is going on, how the machine works. I have learnt that as a parent I am up against YouTube with adults selling the transgender story to my daughter. I am up against a local LGBTU+ youth charity tutoring my daughter privately on the transgender story. I am up against the NHS with their services to process the transgender story. I am up against my daughter’s school who are validating and authenticating the transgender story, and I am up against my ex wife who affirms the transgender story.

The transgender story is just that, it’s a story. Someone has made it up. There’s no science, there’s no law. But it’s story that is consuming children, women and parents to provide evidence the story is real, that it’s not a story. It’s as big a story as creationism, as big a story as Father Christmas.

The machine is literally just that, a machine, at its core it’s just a defined pathway of tick boxes to account for and ultimately protect institutional decisions. Its purpose is to provide a group of adults with validation the story they made up is real, based on children lives. The machine’s existence in this country is an outcome of institutional neglect and cowardice, my disbelief has no bounds.

Raising my voice means a number of things. Being the best possible dad I can be, be more available and listen more. Keeping close to the YouTube algorithm to see what’s being pushed to my daughter. Making it clear that the LGBTQ+ youth charity does not have my parental permission to continue time with my daughter. Telling the GP that I do not support a referral to Tavistock that my ex-wife organised. Opening up a private psychotherapy route to support our daughter with her development in a professional and open minded way. I haven’t worked out how to deal with the school. The school are more detached, their motives and use of safeguarding best practice and resources on any topic is hugely fragmented and difficult to work with.

I have benefited from the bravery of Keira Bell, and many women, teenage girls and a few men willing to put themselves on the front line of extreme personal aggression to bring this story to the attention of many people. I cannot effectively express my gratitude enough, their work is having an immediate and direct effect on offering protection for my daughter from the machine.

I have benefited from the recent political interest their work has generated, and I have benefited from Covid19 that has put a huge brake on the machine.

I contribute financially to support mumsnet in the face of the realities of #nodebate, I support crowd funding legal cases as they appear. I would like to spend more time working 121 with other parents but I don’t have the reserves of energy yet for this.

I have been called transphobic, bigoted and verbally abused for questioning the machine, questioning the story. Asking questions like what’s the rush, why does this have to happen so fast? Exactly when does professional child psychotherapy actually happen to take a look at a gently bumpy childhood? How can a LGBTU+ youth charity with no child professional qualification have such free and protected access, and influence, over a child’s life choices? Which school roles, what qualifications and what criteria do they follow to bypass my parental authority at the school? Why does social transitioning need to delete a child’s history?

I have been very careful about how and when to visibly raise my voice. I am in a fragile position where my daughter has been well tutored with the transgender story, and unqualified people have the authority to transact the transgender story without my parental authority. The natural outcome will be to reduce my role in her life to being an absent father who’s principle purpose is to provide money. That popular, age old stereotypical man we thought we’d lost many years ago.

When I did choose to raise my voice with the LGBTU+ youth charity not having my parental permission to continue their time with my daughter, my daughter attempted to work around me with the school to continue. An action the school had coached her to follow if this happened, based on the trans inclusion policy they follow. I got lucky with Covid19. The impact over the last eight months, has been massive. I have lived a life of sole dedication to this topic, it is the hardest thing I have had to deal with. This has been much, much harder to handle than our divorce, the stress has been monumental.

A dad

Categories
Private sector

I wear my Woman = Adult Human Female hoodie and people have stopped their cars to say “Well Done!”

I am outraged that women are being erased in our Rights stolen, our voices silenced and our needs disregarded. I fight for my daughters, their lives matter more than mine.

I have challenged a number of County Councils over the trans tool kit that blatantly misrepresented the EA2010 Law.

Shropshire, Doncaster, Barnsley, Leicester City, Merthyr Tydfil, Denbighshire and Essex have listened. Not stopping there and more to follow.

I have written to my MP and I have attended another MP’s open meeting and spoke to a crowd of councillors and political activists. (Most frightening thing ever!) I have been part of the ManFriday group (still in touch) and done activities to raise awareness publicly. Currently active on twitter collating links and volunteers and working with Baroness Nicholson and behind the scenes with 4 other groups via Trello and facebook. I took part in the ReSister tee shirt campaign and a trip to Manchester to support teeshirt campaign.

Apart from regular bans on Twitter (BBB to the rescue) and the insults, abuse and threats on there (no longer bother me and I mute most) not really. I wear my Woman = Adult Human Female hoodie and people have stopped their cars to say “Well Done!”

Wendy Johnson, Sister in Action

Categories
Media and Arts

I am a female political cartoonist ‘cancelled’ by UK left wing paper the Morning Star

I care because I am a female  political cartoonist ‘cancelled’ by UK left wing paper the Morning Star in Feb 2020, after they published a cartoon by me about the GRA, then caved in to TRA and union pressure and apologised.  Since then my reputation has been trashed around the world and many people probably now think of me as ‘ that transphobic’ cartoonist’.

They did not communicate with me about their actions, just dropped me after 5 years of being a regular correspondent,  someone who they described in 2015 as their ‘star cartoonist’.

I have joined the Free Speech Union, joined spinster.xyz, and made contact with feminist journalists. I have written to MPs. I have publicised feminist websites and organisations to my friends.

I was threatened with expulsion from my union, and jumped before I was pushed so as not to embroiled my fellow union reps in an investigation which could easily become public and cause them damage. My friend and her 17 year old daughter were so abused on twitter, merely for being professionally linked to me, that they have had to come off twitter for good.

Stella, Cartoonist and book illustrator from Bristol, UK

Categories
Media and Arts

Not one moment of my life has ever been “cis”

As a rape victim and domestic abuse survivor, I know too well the visceral reality of existing in a female body. Erasing womanhood as the unique experience, both painful and joyful, that it is only deepens misogyny and endangers our rights and safety. In the US, women still don’t have constitutional equality! Sex-based rights are specific, distinct and sacrosanct.

Men who grow up with male privilege will never know what it is to be a woman. They have their own struggles. We have ours. If you don’t think abusive men will take advantage of trans self ID laws, then you truly erase women’s lived experiences and oppression.

Even without the opportunists, women shouldn’t have to justify why we deserve our OWN rights and spaces. You would never demand a PoC justify their need for race based rights or race based organizations.

I have been vocal on social media and with friends. In public conversations I object to being called cis or being forced to declare my pronouns. Cis implies a privilege women cannot experience. Cis erases the struggle women face to rebel against and defy gender stereotypes, roles, and behavior. Not one moment of my life has ever been “cis.”

I have been harassed online, usually by liberal men. Most recently, a progressive male spent the night berating me online, mansplaining womanhood to me, calling me a bad feminist, and telling me that female oppression didn’t matter compared to trans males’ feelings.

More frighteningly though, I have had professional contacts in the political world sever ties and support for me over my objection to trans athletes in women’s sports. This not only bullied and silenced me amongst work colleagues, but it also means I lost out on work recommendations from them when I was looking for a job.

María, Indigenous American, asylum immigrant, mixed race female, rape victim, US