Tag: Lesbians

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We were absolutely clear about the need to dismantle sex stereotyping (aka ‘gender’)

I got involved with lesbian and gay activism and then feminist activism in the early 1970s.  We were absolutely clear about the need to dismantle sex stereotyping (aka ‘gender’).  And now it is being amplified despite all the successes we thought we’d had.

I raised the issue of the Labour Party deciding that trans-identified men counted as ‘women’ for the purposes of all-women shortlists et al.  I’ve talked to innumerable friends and acquaintances and a few relations.  I’ve spoken at two public meetings (in Newcastle).  I’m involved in the Labour Women’s Declaration Working Group and in a small group doing some research and analysis for the LGB Alliance.

I got absolutely pilloried in my constituency Labour Party….  One friend is suspicious of what I say but not totally disagreeing.  But that’s all.  I’ve had it easy compared to many.

Alice Bondi, retired psychotherapist and very long-term feminist (as in second wave feminism)

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Healthcare Parent

I want to protect my lesbian daughter, and all the other girls out there

This issue is important to me because I see the risks to women and girls. I want to protect my lesbian daughter, and all the other girls out there.

I’ve attended public meetings of GC feminists, debated on social media and talked to a number of women IRL (in real life). I’ve donated to a few fundraisers and signed many petitions.

I have had difficult conversations with my children, who are split, two pro GC and two anti GC. I have been endlessly insulted and threatened on twitter. I’ve had temporary bans for harmless comments.

JD, Feminist, mother, worker, New Zealand

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I am gay and I also see the damage done to my community

This matters to me mostly because of the safeguarding of our children, particularly young girls. I am gay and I also see the damage done to my community.

Gender non conforming kids (like many of us LGB) are told that they are in the wrong body, based on sexist constructs, that our mothers fought to get free of. Not only that, they are doing irreparable harm to their body. A whole generation of lesbian is being erased. My sisters.

I have mostly talked individually to people and in non gender related FB groups I am part of.

I’ve presented research a psychological point of view of the gender ideology. I just can’t do it under my name yet, for fear of retribution in my work and loss of my license if I say that I won’t affirm at all costs.

I have been mostly followed and harrassed in my private message. My main profile on FB got reported and I had to start over with another profile. But the most disheartening is talking to smart people and being told that it just doesn’t affect them or they don’t see how such a minority could change laws.

DR, Gay gender critical, Canada

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Lesbians

I am a detransitioned FTM and we are never heard or cared about

I care because I am a detransitioned FTM (female to male) and we are never heard or cared about. There are virtually little to no resources for us.

I have been published as a case study in the book “Gender Hurts” by Sheila Jeffreys. My autobiographical piece was included in the book “Dispatches from Lesbian America.”  I was interviewed in the piece “What is a Woman” by Michelle Goldberg for the New Yorker magazine.

I have a now largely defunct blog where I discussed the path back to embracing my biological sex.  I spoke at the Radfems Respond conference in Portland. I have spoken out on Facebook and Twitter. I have been interviewed on video by both The Evil Feminist and by a media channel named Out Here in the Redwoods.

I have been stalked by a trans woman in particular in real life, lost friend groups in both trans activist and radical feminist spaces, gotten doxxed, gotten more rape and death threats than I could count.

I’ve had my physical appearance mocked/ridiculed. Told I was a “failed man” by trans activists and a “mutilated woman” by radical feminists.

Heath Atom Birilli, Just another lesbian woman trying to survive a woman-hating and lesbophobic world, USA

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I am horrified that young lesbians are being gaslighted into having sexual relationships with male-sexed bodies

I am deeply concerned about the erosion of the right of women and girls. The changes in language and our ability to describe ourselves accurately. 

I am horrified that young lesbians are being gaslighted into having sexual relationships with male-sexed bodies. To have university campuses have signs up proclaiming that ‘genital preferences are transphobic’ (I’m looking at you, Liverpool!).

I do not agree with women’s sports being infiltrated by male athletes. I do not consider myself to be transphobic, and much like JK Rowling, think we should all be free to live and love as we choose. However…

…as someone who has been ridiculed and bullied for specifically not ‘liking dick’ forever, to now be expected to accept ‘dick’ as the norm is beyond ridiculous.

I work for an NHS service. I am having open conversations with GNC kids and exploring the issue, rather than jump to affirmations. We are talking about this as a service.

I have had arguments with gay male friends over the use of the word TERF.

RA, NHS worker

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Healthcare

We must remember our hippocratic oath – first, do no harm

I have looked after a trans patient who I met through the injuries they got when they tried to commit suicide.

I then knew a neighbour’s kid who became trans and requested to be known as a different name. This kid’s parent is employed as a parenting expert running Council courses on parenting and I was intrigued and worried as to how miserable they seemed despite a v supportive family.

My sister is lesbian and on the more butch end of the spectrum when she goes to parties though not in day to day life. I realised she would have had pressure to trans if she was living her childhood now and I feel protective to both my patient (who had life changing injuries) and neighbour’s kid.

I have two daughters who are very girly though I myself am a tomboy I would say. As a paediatrician I particularly strongly object to the treatment of rogd (rapid onset gender dysphoria) and in fact all gender dysphoria with hormone blockers /hormones /surgery in children. Logically any of these treatments should be reserved for age 25 plus when brain is emotionally matured.

Legally treatments should be reserved until age 18  I believe but this is against usual medical practice.

I hate the thought these unhappy kids and teenagers may lose sexual health and function, plus libido and osteoporosis etc etc all because the medical profession is failing them. We must remember our hipppcratic oath – first, do no harm.

I have discussed with my sisters who defend trans rights and tell me I’m wrong (including my sister who is lesbian). I have briefly mentioned to my husband. I have read widely on line. I have posted on twitter  once asking whether lockdown may be good for teen trans kids. Otherwise I have not posted as I’m scared of personal and professional repurcussions.

My sisters are slightly distanced from me and critical of my beliefs.

JS, Paediatric doctor and mum of two kids

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Healthcare Others

The silencing of women on this issue is driven by men

I care because I worry about the future for girls and women and I’m outraged about the slow creep of corporate subservience to organisations like Mermaids and Stonewall.

As a little girl I would have expected my Mum (and Dad) to stand up for my rights and although I don’t have kids I have an 8 year old niece. Why should she have to get changed into her swimming costume in front of men masquerading as women? Why should she have to compete against boys masquerading as girls if she chooses to play competitive sport.

The silencing of women on this issue is driven by men and I say this as a heterosexual woman who is in a loving marriage. But if you speak up you are dismissed as transphobic: possibly the laziest insult around these days. I’m increasingly uneasy about being a member of my company’s ERG LGBT group which is aligning itself with Stonewall and all its dubious misogynistic views. Lesbians are being erased and expected to accept male bodied partners. Children being told they are a different gender and young ones being given puberty blockers. A very frightening world.

I am regularly educating and raising awareness with my friends. Only last night two gay friends who are big Harry Potter fans were saying they were confused and didn’t understand the issues with JK Rowling. They were shocked when I told them the issues. It’s easy to assume that all LGB people know all the facts: many are blissfully unaware.

I would absolutely love if someone in the movement could create some materials which people like me in corporations could share internally to raise concerns about the likes of Stonewall who have a jack boot on the neck of big companies in the UK. Most organisations have an internal ‘speak up’ whistleblower mechanism which can be used if people are concerned about anonymity. Not really for me.

I’m a confident and articulate person. I tend to find that those who I speak to are  totally unaware of the facts and when they hear them they are horrified. I suspect many people are watching on the sidelines terrified to be labelled transphobic especially those in the public eye.

Lou, A left leaning feminist who can no longer tolerate the erosion of womankind

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Healthcare Parent

To throw our rights away on fantastical lies is abhorrent

This matters to me because through studying history I have seen the struggle that women went through in order to garner our rights. To throw them away on fantastical lies is abhorrent to me.

I have also watched as the TRAs (trans rights activists) have engaged in attacks straight out of Mao’s strategy book attacking individuals whose only crime is stating the truth.

The erasure of women’s rights, the re-writing of history, the erasure of lesbianism and the erasure of safe spaces for the vulnerable is a coordinated attack and one I feel that I must stand against.

I have made Twitter posts and I have driven my husband mad with my rantings about indoctrination of children at school

I have experienced vitriol on Twitter.

A, I was part of the silent majority, now I add my voice

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Healthcare

In my youth I went on gay rights marches every year. I marched with trans people

I  first became aware of the misogyny in trans ideology in 2015. I was doing an MA in Social Work and the subject was ‘the value of feminist theory for social work practice in domestic violence. I was 50 at the time and although I have always been a feminist I joined the NorthWest feminist and anti capitalist group to get some up to date theory.

A colleague of mine was doing her dissertation on the reform of the Gender Recognition Act. I hadn’t thought much about this until then. Her dissertation was pro reforming it to allow people to instantly self ID. I then read an article by Miranda Yardley in the Morning Star questioning the effects of any proposed reforms of the GRA on womens rights.This was the first time I had heard of Miranda Yardly.

It was a brilliant thought provoking article and I posted it on website of said feminist group and asked that we discuss it. The very next day I was piled on by three transwomen who called me a TERF, said I was transphobic, mocked me and kicked me out of the group.

I was in shock! I was so upset. In my youth I went on gay rights marches every year. I marched with trans people.

I have raised awareness on Twitter, Facebook and supported others in doing so. I have spoken to friends and family.

Apart from getting kicked out of feminist group (described above)  I am treading a fine line in friendship with a friend of mine who is a lesbian but is totally pro trans and wont hear a word against them. She unfriended me for a while on FB. She said she knows I am not transphobic but is worried other people will think that I am. I am not.

CB, The truth matters

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It’s a small life, I can’t trust all that easily and the wounds I carry bleed from time to time, but it’s a life and I owe that to the women that looked after me as soon as I left the airport.

I care about this issue because at the age of 14 I was raped to try and correct my homosexuality. I came to the UK as soon as I could at the age of 18 to seek asylum due to the harassment I received in my home country following the very public trial.

The people that raped me knew what a woman was, if I’d have been a gay man they would have hit and physically assaulted me and not raped me. It is important that we acknowledge and deal with the issues at the heart of violence against women in the UK as well as internationally.

If women coming to this country to seek asylum for MVAW (male violence against women) cannot tell their stories and get meaningful help because their language is now hate speech or exclusionary then how much of a safe refuge is this country?

I was broken when I came here in 2001, I’d experienced an unwanted pregnancy due to the rape and tried to abort at home due to abortion being illegal in my home country. It didn’t work and I was forced to carry my trauma with me for 9 months only to give birth to a child that only survived for 76hrs due to damage caused to his brain by my attempts to terminate. I have to live with this. A lot of women have to live with these kinds of wounds.

We need a place and a language to talk about our issues and to heal. To find support that demands nothing from us, not validation, not that we change our language, nothing.

I managed to get the help I needed and have managed to carve out a life here. It’s a small life, I can’t trust all that easily and the wounds I carry bleed from time to time, but it’s a life and I owe that to the women that looked after me as soon as I left the airport. The female doctors and nurses I was able to ask for, the female therapist who was with me for 15 years and delayed her retirement to help me stand on my own. The lecturers at my university who guided me and helped me gain a degree and become financially independent of the state. The lesbian community that helped me accept myself. They became my tribe, I am thankful.

I have written to my MP, I have been to his surgery to speak to him. He seems sympathetic, he’s from a Religious minority group himself and seems sympathetic but I’m not sure he has really done much about this as his party is firmly pro trans.

I have joined online forums and signed petitions and donated where I could. All the people I speak to seem to be very sympathetic and understand the insanity of where women find ourselves but many fear speaking publicly as do I.

I’ve lost friends. I work in an NHS mental heath setting and most of the people I work with understand the insanity of the current trans movement but this is whispered in dark corners and can never be said openly.

Everyone is scared, I had a colleague say to me a while back that we, as mental heath services, are going to pay dearly for this in a few years time but we daren’t go against the Stonewall lobby that is everywhere in our Trust.

As a mother, grandmother, feminist, educationalist, woman, this matters to me for a number of reasons. As a survivor of domestic abuse, I know how vital to me were women only spaces. I would not have been able to get the support I needed if I had not been confident that specific spaces were open only to women. The fear of such spaces being available to male-bodied people, however they identify, is very real and, I believe, would prevent women from accessing safety, support and much needed resources.

Sex is real. Women are women. Women’s oppression is based on sex. Women’s hard-won rights are in real danger of being eroded. Trans people have rights and, obviously, shoukd do. These are safeguarded in law. As are sex-based rights. The two are separate. One set of rights should not, and need not, trump another. Women are women, transwomen are transwomen and both should be safeguarded.

I am deeply concerned at what is being promulgated in schools and what children and young people are being told online. Feminism has fought for years to break down gender stereotypes. Our nonconforming children should be allowed/encouraged to be just that. Dress wearing boys and tomboy girls should not be told they are in the wrong body.

It’s clear that many young people, disproportionately girls, disproportionately those with conditions like autism, are being put on a path to medicalised transition too early, too quickly and often inappropriately. There is insufficient research into the impact of puberty blockers and what evidence there is suggests not the ‘pause’ as is often cited but the first step in an increasingly inevitable pathway.

Women are being silenced. We are afraid to speak for fear of casually being labelled and abused as transphobic. We are not. Generally, we are progressive women with histories of fighting for human rights and many causes. We haven’t suddenly become bigots. We are not transphobic. We ARE supporters of women’s rights.

I’ve made social media posts, attended consultation at House of Lords and submitted evidence to the Gender Recognition Act consultation.

P, Women matter